Its Cinco de Mayo..only mexican I care to see today is Selma Hyack naked

What's up niggers

Big gay Al

I wonder if Andy Griffith died from Aunt Bee's muff #RIPKurtCobain

Woke up and refused to kiss my woman.... She must not notice her turdstained mustache from Dirty Sanchez

Tell her i said hello from --- Dave RT“@ehr0n: At home enjoying dinner w my mom”

I'm not sure if I'm more disturbed by hearing "what a big one" - in Target or my girlfriend farting and wanting to save it in a jar

I'm giving 4 crosses to the KKK to burn in a niggers yard #BlackHistoryMonth

If I have to go to sleep again without no sexual contact... My wife will wake up with a permanent stink face

I swear if this drug dealer don't stop emailing me I'm gonna snap! How many times I gotta say I don't fucking need viagra!!

Isn't it a bitch the first thing I sit down on all day is the porcelain

How does a mexican drown?! A spic died in my hometown. I don't live near the border either #smh

I don't believe in indoor plumbing but I do believe Lowe's toilet displays are for my pooping pleasures #raptureconfessions

I bet Barack got all kinds of poontang from Michelle last night....unlike my wife who never puts out

#Atablackpersonfuneral I saw a widow fucking her late husband's brother for his welfare check. Niggers these days

#FF @notjamesfranco @realdannytanner @racistandre @sneezingpenis @snuggles8811 @satan @jeffrey__dahmer @jesus_m_christ

#Ificouldiwouldbringback Hitler , so I could shake his hand

My friend Jorge just broke in...pissed off at his wife, can't use a damn key.Bricks la Security calls....give them my password."ass-tastic"

I bet hurricane Sandys vagina smells more than Snooki's

@shelbyafrancis your tweets are like so gay shut the fuck up slut before I go fuck your momma with your strap on