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  • _lisasaurus
      Lisa @_lisasaurus

    i'm so vain that every time i get a retweet i go to their profile and see what my tweet looks like on their page.

    • 76
    • FAVS
    ByebyesanityAvalonLeighGlennyveeFinallyHeSleeps1evilidiotKianaVanDusen____Will8Koinkflap
    • 17
    • RETWEETS
    Byebyesanitybequietmeg________SRbetaKKtheprincessaleneparrthespacewad______skullcatsmoved____YoTrendingTOPIC
    BoyCalledAnn
  • _lisasaurus
      Lisa @_lisasaurus

    a friend of mine asked me if i like fight club. i punched her in the face for breaking the first two rules of fight club.

    • 49
    • FAVS
    MrSandeepPByebyesanitygavinpivottEdmondTheDantesolvera_manshul90FancyCookinMofoseriouslymacho
    • 42
    • RETWEETS
    GaryAdeyLoLoLou1richyfosterAndythefiremankooklamou________lindseyisfine____wioblivionEdmondTheDantes
  • _lisasaurus
      Lisa @_lisasaurus

    if i go to someone's house & they tell me to make myself at home, i immediately take the coke out of my bag & snort it on their coffee table

    • 40
    • FAVS
    Byebyesanitygavinpivottanshul90FancyCookinMofostayclassyutahJeremyInKCsameblackshoes1__Hipyeti
    • 9
    • RETWEETS
    SpartacuntShezMarieDanKCharnleyAnthonyS08periculahatefulfredVoiceOfReason25myprettypower
  • _lisasaurus
      Lisa @_lisasaurus

    i went to my boyfriends house and asked what's for dinner. he was saying all this cute stuff like 'who are you?' and 'stop eating my food!'

    • 29
    • FAVS
    ByebyesanitygavinpivottFancyCookinMofoCseashellsWill8Ksameblackshoes1__TopClassBird______braindeadorc
    • 5
    • RETWEETS
    TopClassBird______HipyetiteddywahBigBang6000NatetheEnigma
  • _lisasaurus
      Lisa @_lisasaurus

    all my friends are either getting married or having kids on purpose. LOLZ joking i don't have any friends.

    • 31
    • FAVS
    Byebyesanitygavinpivottsameblackshoes1__SpeelyFreakingfortuitouslifeItsNotDavey______SpartacuntBoyCalledAnn
    • 2
    • RETWEETS
    DanKCharnleyclaysummers
  • _lisasaurus
      Lisa @_lisasaurus

    one day i'm gonna make a cat very happy.

    • 25
    • FAVS
    ByebyesanitygavinpivottFancyCookinMofomarkrijans________JeremyInKCsameblackshoes1__Sarcasmo718fortuitouslife
    • 2
    • RETWEETS
    FalraeeDeepDarkFear
  • _lisasaurus
      Lisa @_lisasaurus

    i have so many twitter crushes that i don't even know who i don't love anymore.

    • 23
    • FAVS
    ByebyesanitygavinpivottCseashellssameblackshoes1__SpeelyFreakingfortuitouslifehenry_gilbertItsNotDavey______
  • _lisasaurus
      Lisa @_lisasaurus

    twitter is where you ask a serious question and get stars as a reply. (it wasn't meant to be funny, i want an answer)

    • 22
    • FAVS
    Byebyesanitygavinpivottmarkrijans________sameblackshoes1__SpeelyFreakinghenry_gilbertItsNotDavey______Spartacunt
  • _lisasaurus
      Lisa @_lisasaurus

    ran away from home to join the circus but they didn't want me either :(

    • 19
    • FAVS
    gavinpivottmarkrijans________sameblackshoes1__henry_gilbertSpartacuntBoyCalledAnnNatetheEnigmaFeliciovs
  • _lisasaurus
      Lisa @_lisasaurus

    i once tweeted "do you guys even read these?" and now i realise, no, you don't. because neither do i.

    • 18
    • FAVS
    gavinpivottsameblackshoes1__ItsNotDavey______SpartacuntBoyCalledAnnNatetheEnigmaAnthonyS08ITomHorvat
  • _lisasaurus
      Lisa @_lisasaurus

    you know when you start eating bread & realize that it's mouldy then vomit & everyone thinks you have alcohol poisoning for the 5th time?

    • 17
    • FAVS
    gavinpivottsameblackshoes1__fortuitouslifeSpartacuntBoyCalledAnnNatetheEnigmaAnthonyS08_Tweetlejuice____
  • _lisasaurus
      Lisa @_lisasaurus

    i just gave my younger brother my last 80cents. so yes, i am a nice person. just not to you, you annoying piece of shit.

    • 15
    • FAVS
    gavinpivotthenry_gilbertSpartacuntBoyCalledAnnNatetheEnigmaFeliciovsAnthonyS08_Tweetlejuice____
    • 2
    • RETWEETS
    Feliciovsteddywah
  • _lisasaurus
      Lisa @_lisasaurus

    it's so awkward when you're taking naked photo's in your room and your mum walks in.

    • 14
    • FAVS
    gavinpivottmarkrijans________sameblackshoes1__SpartacuntICNMKULVME________ITomHorvatIscofNatetheEnigma
    • 1
    • RETWEET
    hamfritta
  • _lisasaurus
      Lisa @_lisasaurus

    when i'm stoned i look like my avi. true story.

    • 15
    • FAVS
    gavinpivottConfessTsameblackshoes1__SpeelyFreakingfortuitouslifehenry_gilbertICNMKULVME________NatetheEnigma
  • _lisasaurus
      Lisa @_lisasaurus

    the alcohol shop guy told me i was his best customer, and then said i was beautiful and too skinny. i love him.

    • 12
    • FAVS
    gavinpivottsameblackshoes1__SpeelyFreakingMizBlueBallsCelebYouTauntFakeMe4Life______teddywahFeral_Felinity
    • 2
    • RETWEETS
    MizBlueBallsteddywah
  • _lisasaurus
      Lisa @_lisasaurus

    check this one out................. 1

    • 10
    • FAVS
    gavinpivottMrSandeepPorlyonthegoFancyCookinMofoGarnDoggteddywahlittlemaclargeEricMarten
    • 3
    • RETWEETS
    orlyonthegoladyjazsjunkteddywah
  • _lisasaurus
      Lisa @_lisasaurus

    whenever a guy tells me he likes me i have this overwhelming urge to prove to him he doesn't.

    • 13
    • FAVS
    gavinpivottsameblackshoes1__fortuitouslifeNatetheEnigmaAnthonyS08_Tweetlejuice____nateotterHeyZeusTx________
  • _lisasaurus
      Lisa @_lisasaurus

    got my whole new years night planned out. it consists of alcohol, weed, music, my cat, and hating everyone in the world.

    • 13
    • FAVS
    gavinpivottsameblackshoes1__SpartacuntNatetheEnigmaAnthonyS08_Tweetlejuice____ITomHorvatCaraLynnswann
  • _lisasaurus
    • 12
    • FAVS
    gavinpivottsameblackshoes1__NatetheEnigmaFeliciovsAnthonyS08Cognitive_DissVerifiedDrunkllvvzz
    • 1
    • RETWEET
    SendTulips________
  • _lisasaurus
      Lisa @_lisasaurus

    valentines day is coming up. i'm getting my special someone new catfood.

    • 12
    • FAVS
    gavinpivottsameblackshoes1__SpeelyFreakingNatetheEnigmallvvzzzsamalmightysamjoshingsternAspersioncast
@_lisasaurus

@_lisasaurus

I've changed a lot over the past year, but who doesn't?