@ac_money's (Alan C) most faved Tweets...
Put food in fridge to share & wrote "Help yourselves". Realized it could be misinterpreted as inspirational quote so I added ", assholes"
Stars on Favstar are like Twitter currency, but the only thing you can trade them for is self-esteem. ....I'LL TAKE IT.
Lady Gaga speaks out about Kanye West controversy: "HEY!! LOOK AT ME! LOOK AT MEEE! I'M FREAKY!!! GIBBAGOOBAGOOGLYMOOGLY!! *Flail tentacles*
Christians really shouldn't be using the internet. It's like going into an all-porn shopping mall just to use their phone.
Coworker speaks with a German accent so everything he says SOUNDS LIKE AN EVIL PLAN. He just told us about his birthday dinner.. DIABOLICAL!
I look really handsome and stylish today. I'd post a pic, but my camera doesn't take good shots of delusion.
I believe people who like Dane Cook also like Nickelback. Not necessarily a bad thing, just pointing out a cross-promo for Axe Body Spray
At a stag, pretend-to-be-gay jokes are rampant.Do gay guys joke about being straight? "This salmon tastes like pussy" "You would know! Haha"
So what if I woke up from my nap with an erection & a wet spot? It's not like anyone actually buys these IKEA showroom beds anyway
Why is Kevin Bacon not the spokesperson for Wendy's Baconator? That's a missed marketing opportunity for both parties.
Dislodging the ballgag that fell down his g/f's throat while trying out his new sex maneuver, Heimlich knew he was on to something..,
I think if someone invented a scrubbing tool for calloused feet caused by heavy bicycling, "Pedafile" would be a terrible name
Come on, gubernatorial isn't a real word. It sounds as made up as tittygressional or boobsgislation. Whatever, America!
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