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@akantor
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@akantor's (Adam Kantor) most faved Tweets...
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With my wife out of the house I can finally be the man around here, right after I clean the bathrooms and vacuum the basement.
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akantor
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While my wife was out with the kids I had all the locks changed. Let's see if she notices.
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akantor
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The only thing my mac is missing is someone talented and creative to use it.
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akantor
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The Bob Dylan Christmas CD is awesome. I've often wondered what a lizard with excess phlegm sounds like singing Winter Wonderland.
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akantor
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I'm in Twitter limbo. I have the urge to tweet combined with an underlying feeling that no one gives a shit.
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akantor
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14
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My son just told me he is going to give me a "man puzzle" which I can only assume is a woman.
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akantor
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12
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It's a proven scientific fact that sandwiches cut in half by Mom increase in flavor by 125%.
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akantor
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My thoughts are with all the people who've served in the armed forces to preserve our freedoms and way of life.
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akantor
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So, if we working people use Twitter all day, do those people who work at Twitter, work all day?
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akantor
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My calendar is filled with things to do like this room is filled with air.
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akantor
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When asked why he hit his cousin my 3yr old said "I am a legend, covered in jello." What the hell do you say to that?
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akantor
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My 3yr old in no way respects the fact that I organized his Backyardigans DVDs by release date.
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akantor
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In Canada we call American Thanksgiving, "Thursday".
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akantor
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999 roses means I'll love you till the end of time. 998 roses means get the hell out of my house you lying bitch.
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akantor
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Laying in bed reading comics on my laptop. Don't worry, I have the covers pulled over my head and my flashlight shining at the screen.
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akantor
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Stupid headache, lately I've been popping Tylenol like they're Vicodin.
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akantor
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When my kids look back at at my tweets in 15 years they are probably going to say, Dad, you missed my childhood for this?
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akantor
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I just found some chips under my keyboard. Could be a little fresher but whatever.
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akantor
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CNN is now reporting that as of 10:42am there are no more original Tiger Woods jokes.
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akantor
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I've been listening to an MP3 of a crowd cheering all day which has made everything I've done feel like a major accomplishment.
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akantor
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