@amoir's (amoir / Amy Gray) most faved Tweets...
I also get my 5 year old daughter to scream "I AM A MOTHERFUCKING MIRACLE, YOU CUNTSTAINS" at Pro-Choicers. #unfollowcompetition
Sorry, Melbourne. I promise to not yell "BUKKAKE LATTE!" after spilling coffee across my face and chest at a nice restaurant again.
Goddamn it, I love this meal so much I want to marry it, grow old and have awkwardly public fights in Ikea together.
I may be naked, on a table, drinking antifreeze & singing Memories but I called this budget meeting, goddammit, & I'll run it the way I want
I've reached the point where I can sense an oncoming storm with certainty. I can also hear carbs and smell leggings worn as pants.
News that Amy Winehouse's implants are leaking moves her a step closer to her complete transformation as bottle of Vodka.
I think I've finally found the perfect present for my friend. How does one wrap dry-humping?
And now to bed, a land of softness where I rule with a downy fist of justice.
Living in windy old Melbourne-town means wearing any dress requires both vigilance and nice underwear.
My body has found new place to hold fat. Awesome. My dream of transforming into a soft, overstuffed pillow is close to being realised.
Twitter, I ate too much at dinner. Can one of you rub my belly, stroke my hair, validate all of my life choices and tell me I'm pretty? Thx
When I say today hasn't been a good day for dignity I mean a bird shat on me, I got busted looking at Japanese porn& my boobs broke a button
Have to rewrite 7 deadly sins. Not getting past the initial stumbling block. Which would be sloth.
Why I suck as a parent: Croque Monsieur dinner & slurpee dessert.

Why I rock as a parent: Croque Monsieur dinner & slurpee dessert.
Alright, night night. Nipple tweaks to all of you. I think you've deserved them.
Please stop loving one another in front of me. I need this bile to digest my lunch.
Not had any of usual 3 coffees by 10am. Related: changed name to Stabitha McStabbison- Stabbyshire- Stabton- Die- Fuckers-Die by deed poll.
Love's like a colostomy bag: filled with shit that's only important to you and should be hidden from polite society.
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Stupid things in this world: bread ties, espadrilles, yakult, restraint, expensive mineral water, non-talking parrots and me. Goodnight.
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No Internet connection in office. ATTICA! ATTICA! ATTICA!
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