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i can't believe i never realized that if you eat chocolate chips and then brush your teeth it tastes like mint chocolate chip ice cream
Dreamed that I was looking through the many varieties of Cool Whip at the store and there was a kind specifically for people in mourning
ALL NOODLES ARE GOOD AND DO NOT NEED TO BE JUDGED AND RATED BECAUSE THEY'RE ALL CARBS AND ALL GOOD
zyrtec label says "children under 6 years: ask a doctor" yeah like they have the resources to book an appointment come on
"i do weed"
i've been hearing a lot of rumors today that snow is tiny ghosts
Seriously, someday, someone is going to just crack, and hunt down the guy who voices the Spotify ads, and suffocate him
Petition to hire @dads_secret!!! Everyone's Favorite Divorced Sad Dad http://www.buzzfeed.com/mikehayes/hippest-resume-you-have-ever-seen … via @buzzfeed
"Bizarro Jerry" is the best captcha I have ever gotten and why can't they all be like that
PLEASE DO NOT RATE NOODLES IN SUCH AN ABSURD WAY THAT IS COMPLETELY WRONG
Bloomberg comes in waving American flag and riding Pants the goat. Pants makes an eloquent speech
i've already seen downton abbey season 3, it's so funny that all these people don't know yet that the dowager countess is gossip girl ~hehe~
i hope hurricane sandy goes as hurricane irene for halloween
I love farts?
Is there a limit to how many women a cat can legally own?
Senior Designer at @BuzzFeed. MR F http://thesecretgoldf1sh.tumblr.com/