Why is it that models model while standing on the hood of a car? I have never stood on the hood of a car. I guess that's why I don't model;)

I read all tweets with a random accent. @iamdelfreaky has a Minnesota accent @thedorkygirl has a swedish accent. @amberdonn southern drawl.

What's up with Toddler,Tiaras, and pixie sticks. They are all hopped up on sugar and soda.

This brings back memories. pic.twitter.com/N0bFGM3X

An angel, a wiseman, and a wise guy @coachsalmond pic.twitter.com/z9lGkmzY

I only realized while trying to put something in my pocket at work that my pants were inside out. Wow. I hadn't even had a drink.

Sitting in the bathroom,little cell service. I am holding my phone up to the window like the lion king presenting his heir.

well child #1 in school today. Baby heads to first day of kindy tomorrow. Not sure what I am gonna do with all this time. Tweet more maybe

@ryan9billion Twitter. Teaching the world to sing in perfect harmony.

@parajanitor no truer words have been tweeted.

@werbo1937 yah and she named it Gail.

Lots of rain-lots of earthworms. Can't step on them, I always think of Slimy the worm from Sesame Street. Too cute.

My heart is hurting for my best friend today. Her 19 year old son was killed in a car accident. Hold your children close, hug them,kiss them

I like to imagine that there is a little dude controlling auto correct and laughing his ass off every time someone tweets. Muaahhhhhaaa.

I am still a kid at heart. I just can't resist stepping on a frozen puddle and hearing that cracking sound. Anyone else?

Well is it officially spring. My son peed in the backyard for the first time since the snow fell.

#SometimesWeHaveTo. Just shut our mouths and let people make there own mistakes. Even though we are just trying to help.

I still like to lay on the floor to watch t.v. and put my blanket over the heat register. Its my own house now mom you can't tell me no. Hah

@larryjlund is hoping 2 hit the big 100. Come on people help a guy out. If you tell 2 friends and they tell 2 friends and they tell 2 friend

#FF-@bigbadblake @blondhousewife @classicmegan @courtchristine @eric_bader @larryjlund @mrwordsworth these people make me smile. Yah you.