"Can't wait until I grow up & inexplicably become a chef at a fancy expensive restaurant!" -- every tattooed kid into punk rock in the 1980s

Hey @prodigalsam, this is wack and bums me out! pic.twitter.com/PwyiaYdykU

I was the only girl on a 25-email deep thread about Batman today, in case anyone wants to get married

CODE RED! CODE RED! SHUT THE INTERNET DOWN! pic.twitter.com/tEM8bCt9z7

How cold hearted & arrogant is the ground control guy in Bowie's Space Oddity? "Tell my wife I love her very much--" "SHE KNOWS (eye roll)."

MY GMAIL HAS BEEN DOWN FOR FIVE MINUTES! I ALREADY GREW A BEARD AND MOVED INTO A CABIN DEEP IN THE WOODS! TECHNOLOGY HAS BETRAYED US!

Sorry it took me until 2012, but I finally made that Venn diagram for Rage Against the Machine's "Killing in the Name." http://t.co/gblEfNF1

With all the differences they list, how come one of the lyrics in Paula Abdul's Opposites Attract wasn't "I exist / and you're a cartoon" ?

I'm not racist, but if you were born in the 1990s, I hate you.  http://whoarethestoneroses.tumblr.com 

Most of the time I'm like, "What?" but then other times I'm like, "Huh?"

A dude comic was all "I don't go to strip clubs, strippers are too sad/pathetic" & I was like "You talk about your dick into a mic onstage"

I wish I could excel at just one thing the way Will.I.Am excels at being terrible at everything. #rap #cap #nap

I feel like Natalie Portman's laugh just killed a million indie dudes' boners. #goldenglobes

NOW GET BEYONCE TO COME BACK OUT AND SING THE THEME TO "THAT'S SO RAVEN"

2 Legitimate 2 Quitimate

If you say you "aren't into" Prince OR David Bowie, I feel worse for you than if you'd told me you lost your whole family in a fire tornado

Steven Tyler looks like he sells turquoise out of an RV in New Mexico

New law: If your business uses Comic Sans on the menu or any of the signage, I'm allowed to pay for my food/items with Monopoly money.

An Italian woman left $13 million to her cat in her will. MEOW MONEY, MEOW PROBLEMS!

Went to see The Dark Knight Rises trailer on the big screen! Also, as a bonus, they showed the whole Avengers movie afterward! #value