RE:Hannibal: tired of how upset that pussy Will Graham gets over murders, yet I'm a wreck for 3 hrs after someone flips me off in traffic

Call me jaded, but after seven years, The Most Interesting Man in the World really bores me.

In Chicago we don't die the river for Cinco De Mayo like we do for St. Patrick's; we drop a 4000 lb. lime wedge in the lock by Navy Pier.

Team Suck It Canada

Waves from upper deck behind home plate RT @ariq: I spy @yankeemegs. #NotReally pic.twitter.com/W7nUDC3geR

You're stupid, New Jersey Turnpike.

Read Larry Davids hysterical piece in the New York Times. Larry makes me happy. My Son, the Terrorist  http://nyti.ms/163lP6r 

Ed Hardy is just Hello Kitty for dudes.

IDEA: a Bain Capital-type hedge fund firm called the Stop Hitting Yourself Group

Butts and boobs

MLB All Star voting is the stupidest thing in baseball.

I saw a guy on roller blades yesterday. I automatically looked for his Walkman

Please let loved ones know you're OK. You can register here to find loved ones  http://www.redcross.org/find-help 

All those concerned for loved ones in the #BostonMarathon - you can see where they last checked in here:  http://raceday.baa.org/individual.html 

Nobody break it to Ray J that he wasn't even first.

North Korea just deployed it's Navy.  http://twitpic.com/cgxkn5 

I love WTF: Whiskey, Tacos, Fucking.

Good morning y'all! It's a day to drive across the open road.

Craig Sager looks like an extra in Anchorman.

Breaking: Drake murders Amanda Bynes' pet hamster, Vageena by mistake.