Drake Instagram comments are the best, @chelseavperetti http://t.co/tcebL6i7

My mom wants me to get a new phone and get rid of my blackberry. I am scared.

“@uberfacts: 111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321” you're the Amanda bynes of twitter handles that do fact tweets

OMG @marlomeekins favorited the last tweet. Uhhhh thank you twitter?

One day we are going to scissor each other @justinbieber

OMG @marlomeekins favorited my accidentally pocket tweet. Thank you Levi's?

@marlomeekins

“@houstonchron: Giants sweep a Tiger in World Series” WHAT

“@ohlode: My psychologist told me its normal for people my age to stay up late and wake up late” Is she the same person who runs @uberfacts

“@davidiam_: I wonder what the word is for the fear of big areolas” @uberfacts ?

@pbandjenelley_1 i'm pretty sure @ohlode123 gave marine a blowie once

@ohlode123 i'm 16 forever

RT: @zodiacfacts: Most Libras are racist.

Earlier my sister angrily called me a liberal, how the fuck is that an insult???? Texas never ceases to amaze me.

RT @pattonoswalt: Oh Jesus. Just got this sent to me. Ready? 9/11/01 + 3/10/11 = 12/21/12. Sweet dreams, conspiracy nutter butters!

RT @jonaspolsky: Straight teenagers; It doesn't get better.

RT @meganamram: It's so stupid to text and drive if you're not good at it.

RT @meganamram: Sarah Palin is 46, but she doesn't look an IQ point over 30.