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Guys, it's REVERSE Zombie Jesus. Because he wants you to eat HIS flesh.
#FollowYourHeartNY you CAN afford that one bedroom right upstairs from an ethnic grocery store.
If this tweet gets 1 million retweets, I'll eat my own feces.
Antz in my pants #ImproveFilmTitlesByAddingInMyPants
This is not a tweet.
Facebook is great if you are looking for a reason to hate everyone you have ever known and loved.
nothing is more loathesome than makeup and perfume. I pity those without the self respect to not need it.
You gotta give it up for Amanda Bynes for really pacing herself during her meltdown.
My google calendar just reminded me that the world is ending in a few weeks.
OMG I'm getting married today. What the fuck!?
I can't wait to shoot down Amazon drones to fulfill my Christmas Shopping list.
Can't wait till FEMA comes and tries to force us into camps. OVER MY DEAD, HALF EATEN BY CATS, BODY
Just now realized that Enter Sandman is about getting Sanduskied.
Don't get married or else you lose half of all you worked your whole life for because your wife is a fucking moron.
Got a free wrap from a new Vegan Spot on the corner. Needless to say I'm going to need a second lunch.
Wade Redden has more points than Rick Nash in these playoffs.
I hold my pee until the last minute so my stream sounds more masculine while I cower away in a stall.
a kickstarter to buy an entire endcap of tostitos and salsa, then eat them all my self. I'll make a video of me doing this.
Inventor of the Love Vape™ and CEO of Cyberdildonic Industries LTD (as seen on Shark Tank).
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