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Last Thursday living in SF and I (almost literally) stumbled upon a dead homeless man's body on the sidewalk! I can leave now!
Have a VERY unhealthy FB obsession with a girl I'm not even friends with's Malibu boyfriend. Today he bought a gun to "kill black people"!!!
OBSESSED with non-English speakers who talk shit on white people right in front of everyone as if no one can tell. Honestly my heroes.
"Peggy Olson would NEVER let this happen." -inescapable thought I have every time I watch any commercial
A fun game I play with my dog is "was that a wet burp or vomit?" It's like Russian roulette.
Read the texts my real estate agent and I exchange and you might think she's my therapist who has put me on suicide watch.
Welp, I'm drunk now, but my work is done!
In a weird mood so I went to Bloomingdale's to poop and the bathroom was full of women hiding just like me!
Okay, Claire, but what is Rayanne Graff doing tonight?
Is Bill Clinton lost?