Zooey Bechamel. Something indie something something emo something cooking show. It writes itself. Money, please.

I'm a fanboy, yes. But Springsteen's #SXSW keynote is funny and inspiring and totally worth an hour of your time. http://t.co/HKYJebsg

You know what? Fuck this shit. I don't need a hug. I need a brave, angry chief executive willing to tackle a powerful pro-gun lobby.

If you're going to be obsessed, there are worse things to be obsessed with than quality, beauty and utility. Thanks, Steve.

I had a gluten-free bagel today, and now I know that "gluten" is the thing that makes food "taste good."

Dear whiny babies in DC: Oh for God's sake grow a pair. Love, everyone in LA. #DCquake

If you haven't read @carr2n's astonishing memoir "The Night of the Gun," what are you waiting for? A discount? Oh. Look. http://t.co/dmODvRt

Watching the somber, dignified scene at Andrews AFB and praying, in my way, that Romney just keeps his big mouth shut for a little while.

Dear NBC: Could you move David Gregory out of the way? He's blocking my view of Pete Williams. Just stick him in a corner or something.

Wow! That thing that happened tonight with the football men! And that owner guy, am I right? Because whoa, interceptions or something! #NFLs

Glad to read that POTUS would never OK indefinite detention of US citizens, and that he plans to hope really hard the next guy won't either.

Surly emo teens, begin the 36-hour countdown to ironically "accepting" my candy... now.

.@lonelysandwich on shooting run-and-gun for @letsembark in New York City. http://t.co/ny6OwDGT

I like to think the Matt Damon guy remarried after Contagion and that's the family in We Bought a Zoo, because it makes me feel less sad.

And somewhere, Craig Kilborn sits and drinks alone. A single tear rolls down his cheek. #rallyforsanity

Remnick gets at something essential: Clarence wasn't irreplaceable because of his musicality. It was about his presence. http://t.co/391xEAg

If you're trying to learn the fate of a NJ shore house, Google Crisis Map has been updated with post-Sandy images. #LBI  http://google.org/crisismap/sandy-2012 …

If I were advising the Paterno family on media strategy, my advice would consist entirely of shushing sounds.

"Anyway, now I'd like to start my speech." #DNC

DC reporters: Don't tell me the hall liked it. Of course the hall liked it. Tell me you're going to factcheck this speech into oblivion.