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I don't want to alarm anyone, but this storm will kill every man, woman, & child in its path.
I wonder how many bands have given up music after iTunes Genius said they sound like Nickelback.
If Palin's going to get this upset about a joke on Letterman, let's not tell her about the Internet, ok?
Our baby will take one bite of food then babble incessantly. It's like living with a Yelp reviewer.
Help! How do I get these naughty photos off my computer? My searches for "porn, how to get off" are only making things worse.
Mowing the lawn sucks.
Until my son is old enough to do it. Then it builds character.
All I ask is that each iteration of Apple hardware support progressively angrier birds.
How is this bottle of sanitizer at the office supposed to protect us from swine flu if we're all drinking from the same one?
OMG, THE SHOT BURNS. IT BUUUUURRRRNNNS.
What? That was an alcohol swab?
Yes, I'm ready.
With my son I can do the same gag over & over and get a laugh every time.
Now I know what it's like to be Larry the Cable Guy.
Remember, kids, every vote counts!*
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Taking my lead from Governor Fallin, I called my insurance agent to let him know my house and both cars were destroyed by tomorrow's storm.
Anybody know when Sarah Palin's last day is? I need to know whether to spring for express shipping on this "Mission Accomplished" banner.
Three minutes. That's the average time from when I start trying to do something on Facebook until I'm seething with anger.
It's bullshit that the IRS doesn't have a way to send your tax refund directly to Apple.
I'm sure the cats will mutiny when I install the baby gate at the top of the stairs.
Which is why I'm making tiny pirate outfits for them.
iOS developer in the publishing industry. I can't stop the bleating.
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