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@bjornkri's (Bjorn Kristinsson) most faved Tweets...
bjornkri
How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one: they're efficient and not very funny.
@bjornkri
bjornkri
My favourite palindrome doesn't start so well: Retteb, si flahd noces eht tub, but the second half is better.
@bjornkri
bjornkri
Helvetica shot the serif.
@bjornkri
bjornkri
Procrastination, thy name is Missing iTunes Cover Art.
@bjornkri
14
frankyjimrayandreakw_mattiezalmlondonali1010ttsecobrilliantologyprintartistdrewmCosaMostroMrBigFistsjorshuwahsmashedpotatoes
bjornkri
Saw the Godfather for the first time yesterday. Don't get the hype: It's such a complete rip off of every gangster film made since 1972.
@bjornkri
11
cbarrettpolinkeugeneweilivejamiezalmatlshoesonwronglevendisjorshuwahsmashedpotatoesIamDoubleG
bjornkri
Received SMS from brother: "HI BJORN HOW R U?"
I Replied: "Fuck off."
Five minutes later: "Well done. That was mum's first SMS just then."
@bjornkri
10
CcSteffmidnightfelinettsecoduncankdrewmCranberryPersonsmashedpotatoesfactualfictiond_riveraDieLaughing
bjornkri
The cat who lost its leg made a faux-paw.
@bjornkri
9
BrilliantOrangettsecocrispycrackajas508smashedpotatoesMrBigFistsfactualfictiond_riveraglsjawtomatica
bjornkri
Asked my friend: Do you think anyone heard me farting? He pulled out my earphones and said: No mate, but I'm sure they heard you shouting.
@bjornkri
9
nyccabgirlDieLaughingjoeschmittlefauxfrogttsecoCcStefftoocoolforschooMrBigFistssmashedpotatoes
bjornkri
I had to remove the 'My Delicious' bookmarklet because I kept reading it out loud in the voice of Gollum and it freaked out the cats.
@bjornkri
9
blobertottodevCcSteffseanhusseyrafitorresCranberryPersonHello_Nursesmashedpotatoesglsjawtomatica
bjornkri
Circular definitions are bad because they're not good.
@bjornkri
8
smashedpotatoessniffyjenkinsCcSteffCranberryPersond_g_d_riveraborgarrongillmore
bjornkri
First day at new job. Wondering if I should shower, or will that set their expectations too high?
@bjornkri
8
ttsecoBalutdetweilerjorshuwahBillMc7MrBigFistssmashedpotatoesglsjawtomatica
bjornkri
This article is about the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle. For the painter, click here.
@bjornkri
7
CranberryPersonCcStefflefauxfrogRodBegbietwistedpfisterlostorbitHeyMickey
bjornkri
Joy ÷ #nerdybandname
@bjornkri
7
califmomohtheinhumanityMrBigFistsapelademoglassesiamnotdiddyMoodySunflower
bjornkri
"Now let's not jump to conclusions, this could still be a fatality."

Keep hopin', Fox.
@bjornkri
7
KalliCcSteffnickemilybriannaphillygirlMrBigFistsd_rivera
bjornkri
Spongebob #squarespace
@bjornkri
7
TerryBainlefauxfrogttsecorafitorresKallithedayhascomesmashedpotatoes
bjornkri
I already peed in the water cooler, what else are you supposed to do traditionally on the last day at work? Ah yes, vomit in the fridge.
@bjornkri
7
eliashiebertfrankyfrageelaydrewmalinasmithttsecosmashedpotatoes
bjornkri
Entered my information into the bus company's route planner. Their first suggestion: walk. And they showed me a map. And called me a loser.
@bjornkri
6
mathcat345BalutCranberryPersoniamnotdiddyMrBigFistssmashedpotatoes
bjornkri
You get the following confirmation dialog: Click submit to cancel.
There are two buttons: cancel and accept.

WHAT DO YOU DO?!
@bjornkri
6
blobertcalifmomTrick_or_tweetMrBigFistssmashedpotatoesd_rivera
bjornkri
Set the alarm to 5:55, knowing the wife would kill me if it went off. So I cunningly woke up at 5:54 and switched it off, James Bond style.
@bjornkri
6
Beef_TongueCranberryPersonBalutsmashedpotatoesFriedaClubfactualfiction
bjornkri
Funny how two days after arriving in a new country you find yourself queueing in IKEA.
@bjornkri
6
bumpcrudCcSteffCranberryPersonKallismashedpotatoesBrilliantOrange
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