Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
MISSING: SUPER ADORABLE PUPPY. WILL COME IF YOU PLAY WU-TANG HELLA LOUD. THIS IS NOT A PLOY TO GET THE NEIGHBORHOOD BUMPIN', THE DOG IS REAL
Oh, I can't check my disobedient child with the rest of my luggage? You're saying I have to carry-on my wayward son?
to the person who made their laser tag name Cool Sex Falcon please return to the front so we can give you a real gun
Crime rates are down 100% after President Obama made it illegal to do crimes. "I don't know why we didn't think of this before," he said.
bigfoot saw me naked and laughed at my dick. hes real all right, a real asshole
Cant believe how hard core Nirvana was... tricking a baby with money, and then the baby drowned, and u can see its wiener.. Damn
God... you are NOT the father *God krumps all over the stage as Mary weeps profusely*
Hundreds of 69-year-olds commit mass suicide. "They'll have to say 69 on the news a lot," said the leader of the group, a huge bad-ass.
Hello Mudda / Hello Fadda / I no longer / believe in God-a / Now please don't re- / -coil in horra / but I also went and purchased a fedora
I wish we could see inside the opposing team's locker room in Air Bud. "IT'S A FUCKING DOG. HE'S LIKE 2 FEET TALL. HOW ARE YOU GUYS LOSING."
Your honor i couldnt have committed that murder. Im a man - I cant commit to anything!! *all-female jury laughs, renders not guilty verdict*
Hi, folks. *catches Bible from offscreen* It's me, Tim Tebow. *throws Bible like football* As you-*linebacker runs Bible back for touchdown*
Teen Astronaut reports that the unparalleled majesty of outer space is "stupid and gay."
*mitt leaves stage* *attempts to rip flag pin off lapel, can't* *has to unpin it properly* *throws it at garbage can, misses*
You're a loose cannon, Detective. Hand in your badge. AND your gun. AND your badge that is actually a gun. AND your gun that shoots badges.
Okay, so we're either calling it Pangaea, or *audible sigh* ...Continent Orgy. *a single scientist in back of room cheers*
Mitt Romney: I'M SPITTING ON MY HANDS AND THEN RUBBING THE SPIT ON MY EYES. IS THAT CRYING? AM I CRYING, ANN? ANN?
[scrambles into room, completely out of breath] THE NEW POPE... [puts hands on knees, exhausted] SHOULD BE... MANTI TE'O'S GIRLFRIEND