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  • boring_as_heck
      stefan @boring_as_heck

    Gift @boring_as_heck Favstar Pro to unlock their best tweet!Gift them Pro!

    • 23k
    • LIKES
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    • 12k
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  • boring_as_heck
      stefan @boring_as_heck

    RT if you remember when lyrics used to mean something: pic.twitter.com/uIO4PvMhU4

    • 14k
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    butter_dumpsterJoeHankinkmart_64Morgan_Ingeandtho93colin_mortimerWonAThingOnceDMoneyMax
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    • RETWEETS
    tabithanneaimlacsgreg_keenan21canyonrennersheenashah98badawfulboybutter_dumpsterJammyramain
  • boring_as_heck
      stefan @boring_as_heck

    [dumps gatorade on coach after losing the big game] we know how much you hate gatorade you piece of shit

    • 15k
    • LIKES
    Good_Guy69AdmiralHotcakesBoGMusic50_MissionCapnickskiesColdFriesKyleCabinetRoxyLange
    • 7,880
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  • boring_as_heck
      stefan @boring_as_heck

    Next, on TLC's Lunchbox Wanters

    RON: Back off, Jim. That box is mine.

    [CUT TO INTERVIEW]

    RON: No way was I letting Jim get that lunchbox.

    • 10k
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    frankfasthandssdcnualsmith208turnerjerJTchubbycheeksjordan_potterevan__forevergosensgo101
    • 5,565
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    gojarbeLaser_CatmichaeljdawsondanrgraberbromanconsulPlaying_DadkDuncanGdanjan13
  • boring_as_heck
      stefan @boring_as_heck

    MISSING: SUPER ADORABLE PUPPY. WILL COME IF YOU PLAY WU-TANG HELLA LOUD. THIS IS NOT A PLOY TO GET THE NEIGHBORHOOD BUMPIN', THE DOG IS REAL

    • 7,368
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    MeLlamoLlama_zuzuzuspetalsIsaacTrailunderallsbenicus_rexfergisCordillydallyCharoShane
    • 6,065
    • RETWEETS
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    ACoolGhostcrylenolA_JahhakacrispymattelgatoTheFearBoners____EvaGisellecorsalomarcheeriojrrrdam_katonQVT
  • boring_as_heck
      stefan @boring_as_heck

    to the person who made their laser tag name Cool Sex Falcon please return to the front so we can give you a real gun

    • 7,688
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    ReedisagirlbbygravypixelatedboatBurger_Time_TheAmitieMrColeDanielwarmyellowlightSirEviscerate
    • 3,869
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    WhatevaConcJermHimselfishDJ_PiddlesChase_Observespattymoneatdeerthe_kizzlerobfee
  • boring_as_heck
      stefan @boring_as_heck

    Oh, I can't check my disobedient child with the rest of my luggage? You're saying I have to carry-on my wayward son?

    • 4,971
    • LIKES
    Shane_B2010mastawingmanchristhormanAntlerPestleembellishedcatrickgaskoSekelskyjohnlmurphy
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    Weedcoffin__chrisjooniorQVTiandury007
  • boring_as_heck
      stefan @boring_as_heck

    I'll take "That's Not A Category" for $200, Alex.
    "That's not a category."
    Yes, that's right.
    "That's not a category."
    I chose that, yes.

    • 5,798
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    AndLive2LoveembellishedcatmjrotterDCpiersoncornaxIsaacTrailholf18cardull0
    • 2,895
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  • boring_as_heck
      stefan @boring_as_heck

    bigfoot saw me naked and laughed at my dick. hes real all right, a real asshole

    • 5,342
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    Your_Boy_DylanembellishedcatSupaMalamanalura__uneEmilyTheLilinMeat_spoonSamJooones10problematic
    • 2,438
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  • boring_as_heck
      stefan @boring_as_heck

    Joe was really good at making movie trailers. There was just one problem *car honk* he didn't have access to the record scratch sound effect

    • 4,833
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    godinthischilisOfficelifescoolvaluzziStAdkisonWaldo_ChristjoanofdarknessActualPerson084bunbronett
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  • boring_as_heck
      stefan @boring_as_heck

    Crime rates are down 100% after President Obama made it illegal to do crimes. "I don't know why we didn't think of this before," he said.

    • 3,758
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    oneunderscore__educaz1Karatefacekidgerudokugoatenthusiast7tweet_faverwillmccomasBrittonUpchurch
    • 2,415
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  • boring_as_heck
      stefan @boring_as_heck

    Hi, folks. *catches Bible from offscreen* It's me, Tim Tebow. *throws Bible like football* As you-*linebacker runs Bible back for touchdown*

    • 3,640
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    6thgrade4everinsideoutside15kooschneetskitylerkabanazaccrainGregorStocksSir_Shakes_ALotteeg_dougland
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  • boring_as_heck
      stefan @boring_as_heck

    dinosaurs were super shitty. this t-rex? he sucked [spots real tour guide talking to security + gesturing @ me] tour's over. fuck dinosaurs.

    • 4,321
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    AndLive2LovekettyblumFcamps412alf_96_sandwichessssundayjestThiefreeSaint_Martha
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  • boring_as_heck
      stefan @boring_as_heck

    Damn girl, is your dad an astronaut? Because I'd like to meet him. Please let me meet your astronaut dad.

    • 3,785
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    • 2,063
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  • boring_as_heck
      stefan @boring_as_heck

    Your honor i couldnt have committed that murder. Im a man - I cant commit to anything!! *all-female jury laughs, renders not guilty verdict*

    • 3,804
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    prodigisandrewjmcconnTuffsBuffsKevin_HuppTheRealJono1SamSheehanWithington4TonyLakey
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    michaeljhudson__KKAlThaniOzymandingus______QVT
  • boring_as_heck
      stefan @boring_as_heck

    An immense thank you to whoever just snapchatted me a picture of their ass with a huge castle in the distance. pic.twitter.com/nzVUn9liwm

    • 4,159
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    makeitsnowondemAndLive2Lovesporeguyariley_foxyellowproseAaron__Joesexyadorablemanroughnreefy
    • 1,422
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  • boring_as_heck
      stefan @boring_as_heck

    welcome to Being A Ghost. Here are your chains for some reason

    • 3,390
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    • 1,355
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    RowdyBowdentlemco
  • boring_as_heck
      stefan @boring_as_heck

    EINSTEIN: I call it "the theory of relativity"

    SCIENTIST 1: Nice one Einstein

    SCIENTIST 2: Yeah good job Einstein

    EINSTEIN: Fuck you guys

    • 3,566
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    • 1,106
    • RETWEETS
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@boring_as_heck

@boring_as_heck

writer, dipshit, co-idiot on @RealGoodShow, author of Generation Selfie: Hashtag Win (Random House, 2016)

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