Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
This chick at the food market really needs to put her baby on vibrate.
Can I have your number. Or do you just want the 50 bucks for the drink?
Id rather run a marathon than listen to someone talk about how they ran a marathon.
How come when a boy have sex with everyone, hes a play boy, but when a girl has sex with everyone shes my girlfriend?
On the reals tho, I'm so hungry I could instagram a horse.
Cheffing postion open at my lodge. 5star game lodge 1 hour from joburg. Must be qulafied. Minimal experience ok. Contact me. Shot.
Bull shit. You dont live once. You live every day. You only die once. Enjoy life.
My girlfriends cooking hasn't killed me yet. So it must be making me stronger.
Im so glad we dont have to hunt for food anymore. I dont even know where sandwiches live.
A worm is quite a shitty prize for waking up early if you ask me.
They called him Jew-ish like he wasnt Jew enough or something
"I donno what the fuck this tastes like" - first dude to ever eat chicken.
My doctor told me to start killing people. Well it wasn't those exact words. He said I needed to reduce the stress in my life.
Still waiting on the "Once you go black, you'll never go back" episode of Mythbusters.
There is literally no way of knowing how many chameleons are in your house.
saw a midget carrying a tv to his car. I asked if he wanted some help with that plasma? He told me to fuck off, it was an IPad... :(
Scooters are for men who want to ride motorbikes, but prefer to feel the wind on their vaginas.
Say what you like, but the hardest thing in the world is to still try look happy when no money falls out your birthday card.
Fuck what you think. The hardest thing in the world to do is look happy when you open a birthday card and no money falls out.
I'm Bryan 'the instigator', I spells bad, but I fux well. Some say the glass is half full, others say its half empty, I say is anyone going to drink that?!