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Being all warm and snug inside when there's a blizzard outside, must be what a penis feels like inside a vagina.
I want a guy who I can cuddle with while it's cold and snowy outside.
I hate the fact that every time I'm done taking a shower I'm freezing.
I'm starting to doubt if I'll ever find a man that can make me laugh as much as I make myself laugh.. I should probably just marry myself.
Ever have a raging narcissist give you a compliment? It feels like when Scrooge started being nice at the end of 'A Christmas Carol'.
A Sunday just isn't a Sunday if you can't watch one of the "Police Academy" movies on TV.
I wonder how many in-n-outs are in a typical fuck. I should count sometime.
It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas, cunts are everywhere.
Vegans, just shut the fuck up the next couple of weeks. This time of year isn't for you.
I wish I had someone that I could message at any time of the day or night.
I either like people too much or not at all. There's not in between.
Today a gay man told me I gave him a boner and a homeless man called me beautiful. Killing it!
The worst part about love has to be where people expect you to feel it back.
Hunger games tu m'as embrasé total 10/10
Today's story brought to you by the letter S, for "Shut the fuck up."
Can we all just talk a moment to appreciate how warm, cosy and comfortable my bed is right now. ♡
Ice cream agaaaaaaaaaain! I love being in charge of my own meals.
Quand je le saurai je vous le dirai… d'ici là, c'est ça qui est ça !