@cassidylucas' (Cassidy Lucas) most faved Tweets...
Someone once said diamonds are a girl's best friend. Fuck that. Ice cream sandwiches are a girl's best friend.
I have been in anatomy lab for most of the day. I smell like cadavers. A woman just asked me what perfume I'm wearing... uh... dead guy #32?
I hate it when people are rude to nurses at the Doctor's office. They're about to put a needle in your arm, heifer. Be nice.
I love cleaning my apartment, because when I do I always find fun things. Usually I find money, but this time I found vodka.
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Just watched a group of 17y/o boys trying to change a tire for 15 mins. Finally offered to help & had the tire changed in 5 mins.
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A girl wearing the same shirt as me told me that she looked better in it. I pointed out that I have bigger boobs. She then admitted defeat.
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I just bought my Halloween costume and paid my cable bill... my credit card is screaming in pain.
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I may or may not have just accidentally punched myself in the eye.... Wow TheraFlu makes me ridiculous.
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This guy is outside my apartment, sitting in his truck, BLASTING the Wicked soundtrack, & singing along loudly... awesome sir, pure awesome.
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I have never been groped as much as I have been tonight... gay boys love boobs when they are drunk.
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Is it considered a successful pantie raid if the thief only got away with the ugliest pair I own?
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Oh, I'm sorry sir. Did i almost hit you with my automobile? Well, maybe you should stop standing in the middle of the fucking road. Okay?
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wow. I just found a website illustrating every reason we don't talk to my uncle any more. Holy crap balls.
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Turned on Cinemax a few minutes ago. Caught the end of a porn and the beginning of a Steven Seagal movie... classy.
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