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  • cervixsmash
      UHH @cervixsmash

    The person who invented marriage was creepy as hell like hey yo I love you so much I'm gonna get the government involved so you can't leave

    • 3,019
    • FAVS
    ClxrasanAdamaSeleneboudreaumodesnackchatItsRaniiijanna_faceMACHIN1STSadieBonbons
    • 2,680
    • RETWEETS
    Gavlarrr123YOLOSWAGATTACKSPugPrxncessMACHIN1STyourartpartygone_roguingyoungsynsTightHite
    BromanConsulpbear79ScreaminZeman____CaptainObtuse
  • cervixsmash
      UHH @cervixsmash

    Porn gives young people an unrealistic and unhealthy idea of how quickly a plumber will come to your house

    • 2,684
    • FAVS
    sm1rksJunk_BoatrmecheeyaLittleJimmy61terio1429GreyPath1davidnfieldsmjlopeman
    • 2,545
    • RETWEETS
    Junk_Boatterio1429GreyPath1AaliLala23pankan_RebelScumBAGSskylerhanrathGunDohLickin
    GroperClevelandericonederfulSpankMeIm0tymahatmatweetersanbayArroiaThisAlexSteinVikeeysSecretFredPollackseanx3_theigirlseagullski__
  • cervixsmash
      UHH @cervixsmash

    I like how flies rub their hands together like tiny criminals

    • 2,810
    • FAVS
    davidisnotrightnadineintorontoIncredibleMsDeec_selbySavageChiver11SufficientCharmterio1429GreyPath1
    • 2,093
    • RETWEETS
    1969Cjweldergirl1nadineintorontofkdonkorMisterman567IncredibleMsDeeSufficientCharmterio1429
    painted_eelrollsyrollsyGreeneyedMofo1BigMickIrishVinIvsy01sameblacklist____brainscabskidphonicispypanda
  • cervixsmash
      UHH @cervixsmash

    Blood is thicker than water but maple syrup is thicker than blood so technically pancakes are more important than family

    • 2,240
    • FAVS
    terio1429GreyPath1ItsachopperbabyGregHuusSherBoBerPussycatPlaceoriginalmonkMermaidDelyla
    • 2,588
    • RETWEETS
    terio1429GreyPath1SherBoBerPussycatPlaceMermaidDelylamjamesbcunitedcakedomHollyNrs
    Johnny_RedonzoDJLIWIKZBrianSaetre_vacant___________bucmachine
  • cervixsmash
      UHH @cervixsmash

    What if Jamie Lee Curtis is still in Lindsay Lohan’s body and she’s the one ruining her reputation

    • 2,466
    • FAVS
    radtoriaterio1429GreyPath1synchrosignsAlexC1971CrazyForMoxleyfragmentarygirlGSHOK9
    • 2,084
    • RETWEETS
    terio1429fragmentarygirlNiki8881PussycatPlaceurbanteabagMind_fukkGBRougecityericspratling
    iamfaseShrinkMediajoeljeffreyCatLitterGirl____littlekitnerboyWhosTheresa
  • cervixsmash
      UHH @cervixsmash

    I was so high I cried because I realized snakes are just tails with faces

    • 2,307
    • FAVS
    VaginaEnvyterio1429GreyPath1ItsachopperbabySherBoBerDadandBuriedsoupisgooddudehollysnark
    • 1,346
    • RETWEETS
    terio1429SherBoBerGBRougecity76_dicksShutUpThatsWho_TheGoodsskcMcCowgirlmarrusya6
    HALFniteStandholypurgatoryBrianhopecomedyHrBrybrakcoh3ll0d0llykarencreets______
  • cervixsmash
      UHH @cervixsmash

    Why does toilet paper NEED a commercial? Who the fuck is not buying toilet paper?

    • 1,816
    • FAVS
    radtoriaterio1429GreyPath1ItsachopperbabyangieissosezgeeSherBoBerDadandBuried
    • 1,313
    • RETWEETS
    terio1429SherBoBerkrishna_vanmarrusya6RaginJasonrhizomelifeCameron_The_Kidyosienaa
    mrjohntofu_wangweNoLuckWantedSuburbanComaBakeEmAwayToyzHallpassCanadaSteve_hamiltinSUPERJAYBAG______
  • cervixsmash
      UHH @cervixsmash

    Tell someone you love them today because life is short. But SHOUT it at them in German because life is also terrifying and confusing

    • 1,645
    • FAVS
    Soonerjay75miketheknife007SherBoBeroliverturnerBreadBauncenickrawlsGlendaLeslieGre_Gone
    • 1,355
    • RETWEETS
    MrsBaker420miketheknife007SherBoBerGBRougecityMrCharles24BreadBaunceMaxHeadroom27chapel3929
    jfrank50ChipKellysBallsJosesLovesYouIlovelamp1979Scigglez__________SunnyGirl1717KingPatrick24SCBamaMantokencharlie______ashleycremMadameSnippy______urbusta
  • cervixsmash
      UHH @cervixsmash

    Books are just dead tattooed trees and that's metal as fuck

    • 1,497
    • FAVS
    jannable9DadandBuriedsoupisgooddudehollysnarkShavedSummerVagFabDorkRaspberryPiratespekulation
    • 1,131
    • RETWEETS
    LovesLAandDogslady_vaderxxm3rksecSavage_ScavangeTw0Pennethartcincopaigejiffysarahrosemccray
    Sims_was_heresanbayJaySommerbreatheandlove
  • cervixsmash
      UHH @cervixsmash

    My internet addiction is getting alt of ctrl

    • 1,487
    • FAVS
    FlashyNopeSherBoBerMind_fukkDadandBurieddarya_deesoupisgooddudeKarlTheFagkrispythehuman
    • 959
    • RETWEETS
    Mind_fukkthenickideeGBRougecitydarya_deekrispythehumankrishna_vanMartougkShutUpThatsWho
    Xalqeeella__fraser
  • cervixsmash
      UHH @cervixsmash

    Beyonce made the song "single ladies" then went home to her husband and left you lonely hoes dancing in a circle pretending to be happy

    • 1,070
    • FAVS
    ItsachopperbabyItsThatSquirrelSherBoBerDadandBuriedShutUpThatsWhokcMcCowgirldreamthievinForever420in
    • 1,300
    • RETWEETS
    SherBoBergm_cageEmaSlemaSprBooyspunk72yanilovee1sammyj_04Fuzzy_Karmakazi
    leontymccarthy
  • cervixsmash
      UHH @cervixsmash

    Can we talk about the word queue

    How many of those letters are really necessary

    I count one

    • 1,243
    • FAVS
    radtoriascubaristarGreyPath1RadioNicholeFlashyNopeItsachopperbabykaleystwatterYourFavWrapper
    • 1,065
    • RETWEETS
    GreyPath1patheticpotatohRadioNicholeDrMarkus21SherBoBerDuMaDishessolo_red_cupWebbPaganfinger
    WhatevaConc24HourBitchingClancynonosimprov
  • cervixsmash
      UHH @cervixsmash

    If your religion is worth killing for, please start with yourself

    • 1,311
    • FAVS
    TTruemanmark_loomisdjmayhoneTheAngIncTwoScoopsofpeaKYGingerWICKEDTRUTH01LaBelleMae
    • 922
    • RETWEETS
    TTruemanKYGingermrtruthandsoulYourFavWrapperSherBoBerlydia_harperblarybleuartladyjazsjunk
    GreyPath1AHoundNamedAlbanigelgodwinholypurgatoryserialmatrixCuddleYourCatVoiceofgarthitmurrayDeanB15
  • cervixsmash
      UHH @cervixsmash

    I love sleep because it’s like a time machine to breakfast

    • 1,392
    • FAVS
    radtoriaSherBoBeralex_samuel_nickrawlschapel3929soupisgooddudehollysnarkShutUpThatsWho
    • 807
    • RETWEETS
    iwanttapiocachapel3929naggaliemdpakrattamantha6pharmblockgm_cageKristaMcMurray
    J_Dazzle76rossbransondetroit_etWonderMonkey78RapeyRaperton
  • cervixsmash
      UHH @cervixsmash

    Dad: Why are you eyes so red, son?

    Son: I smoked weed, dad

    Dad: Don't lie to me, you were crying because you are a faggot

    • 1,266
    • FAVS
    samLM68allysun__SherBoBerEvileSkullmotrboatrfletchworld73DarzieDAMNNATxHAN
    • 832
    • RETWEETS
    SherBoBermotrboatrFuzzy_KarmakaziQckhdyakionodildointheroughStun_OneEvilSmurf_Nope
    spcycucumberAirGuitarHeros__GarreTheFerretu_jellicentToneLoOnTheGonavesssaJosesLovesYouJizzIam__________
  • cervixsmash
      UHH @cervixsmash

    Calm your tit. Just one tit. Leave the other one crazy and out of control. That's your party tit

    • 1,159
    • FAVS
    samLM68SherBoBerTDeeRockmorganwagner15daniel_panielMonicann86ABetschjoeljeffrey
    • 767
    • RETWEETS
    SherBoBeremma_boneImNotLaRouxSpicey_RosewelustpapessamvariasthenameislauraDadandBuried
    ibid78MandyUncle________Jesssicle
  • cervixsmash
      UHH @cervixsmash

    Ain't no condoms in my wallet girl those are ramen noodle flavor packets

    • 1,229
    • FAVS
    allysun__SherBoBerDadandBuriedsoupisgooddudeProf_PeejayhannahcyanideGreenestSidegreggoodman77
    • 658
    • RETWEETS
    SherBoBerjohnwardbrocatocoreymarie89kv8dreamthievinrolaskotoxxpimpdaddysatanbutterflysimin
    Clancygarth0ff__________
  • cervixsmash
      UHH @cervixsmash

    If a white woman goes to the Caribbean and doesn't get cornrows did the trip even happen?

    • 1,081
    • FAVS
    SherBoBerDadandBuriedTw0Pennethgm_cageDarzieDAMNALF_from_TVAineAnisa__openchakra
    • 763
    • RETWEETS
    thatdunkii_DivineeeeCleotrapstarroxii_moriiJustForHTRobHick1216dreaminDMgreggjgc79
  • cervixsmash
      UHH @cervixsmash

    I hate how if a woman has sex with a bunch of guys she’s considered a slut, but if a guy does the exact same thing, he’s ‘gay’

    • 1,028
    • FAVS
    GrayBellnapHuntcommaLaurasarah__bowman_fartnettProfessorNippleAveryPogueIWantATardisjoeycoppafield
    • 642
    • RETWEETS
    BeerMeatsarah__bowman_ajones96DadandBuriedDJLIWIKZJanellLenorebearcub577UncleKermit
    katy_baybay
  • cervixsmash
      UHH @cervixsmash

    Getting married at 22 sounds a lot like leaving a party at 9.30pm

    • 1,010
    • FAVS
    DadandBuriedsoupisgooddudegm_cageFuzzy_KarmakazipoliticsandsexStickyickyBunsgenerator5000dandaman6200
    • 599
    • RETWEETS
    leah_fshrAlannaGaglianimarerageShelbyLengyelItsMaxMaherallyzayyDoctor_Mandosarahtahami
    almostheavenly
@cervixsmash

@cervixsmash

http://favstar.fm/users/cervixsmash