Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
Is it worse to kill 15 people or wear a fedora
Imagine Steve Harvey eating your pussy
Louis Vuitton condoms protect society from the babies of people who would use Louis Vuitton condoms.
AND WITH JUST 3 WORDS "IT CAME TRUE" HALF OF AMERICA VOMMED ALL OVER THEIR TV AND COUCHES
HATERS ARE GOING TO HATE CREATORS ARE GOING TO CREATE
NO IPHONE I NEVER WANT TO SAY DUCKING OR DUCK
I feel like I'm not getting retweeted enough for how cool all my thoughts are
"Binders full of women" will be in a Drake lyric by morning
Bane is trending bc it is hard to think of original jokes
HEADS UP: Sometimes I text "hahaa" + my iPhone autocorrects it to "HAHAHAHA" based on a past time I laughed harder at a funnier joke
"Steve Martin is a great male comedian!" -no one, bc it would sound stupid
"It's so cold out!" "It's not cold out." OH COOL I DIDN'T KNOW YOU HAD WEATHER VETO POWER I STAND CORRECTED
If you hate your life, change something. That way you won't be a dick to everyone you encounter
The caption for all Instagram pics should be: "I think this makes me seem cool."
Once you say "amazeballs" you render your yelp review null and void