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LOOK, I JUST DON'T THINK I COULD HANG WITH ANNE HATHAWAY, OKAY? I PROMISE I'M STILL A FEMINIST.
Guess how many margaritas I have had in the past three days? Hahahahhaa I don't know either I lost count at like, 25!!!!!!!!!!!
"Yeah, you guys are really going into a shitter of a job market/economy but HEY, HAVE FAITH!!!!!!" - every adult speaking at graduation.
"I had a love affair with that album." - me talking about Funeral by Arcade Fire and also being a huge fucking asshole at the same time.
After 10 months, 7 nervous meltdowns, 3 meetings with my advisor, and 1 test that I cried during: I GOT A 90 IN FRENCH.
If Pete Campbell and I were the last two people on Earth and we had to have sex in order to repopulate I would let humankind die out.
"I want to do this. No, I want to go home. This is fun! I hate it here. Why are we doing this? OMG HI! Let's go." - me in public, always.
Presidential Platforms: eradicate revolving doors, sushi for lunches for all, more pie.
Don Draper is the epitome of everything I hate about men. Naturally, I want to make love to him/save him.
Does your girlfriend know that you can see her "The Big Day!" Pintrest board on Facebook? Also, does she know you're not engaged yet?
Please don't look at me as I hatefuck these mcnuggets.
Dirty Talk: tell me about the last museum you visited.
I am constantly losing the remote. Your Manic Pixie Nightmare Ex-Girlfriend.