Jessica Leandra got more famous from being a racist moron than when she pouted for cameras in her knickers. Oh the irony.

It's International Talk Like A Pirate Day! QUICK! Teach me some Somalian!

@helenzille If you were trapped with your peers at parliament for weeks without food, who would you eat first? #askhelenzille

Everyone thinks that girls dream about finding the perfect guy. In fact, it's every girl's dream to eat without getting fat.

Why enable comments on news sites? It's like reading a newspaper in a room filled with racist morons. Allow me to formulate my own opinion.

I'm not sure if I can play Bad Piggies. Angry Birds has preconditioned me to hate them. I guess I must learn to forgive. Deep, Rovio.

Look everybody, @garymeyerza and @jessicamcd are getting married http://t.co/eR5Uuc3u

No, Google image search, we do NOT display Edward Cullen when I am searching for Christopher Walken. DO YOU WANT THE UNIVERSE TO IMPLODE?

I'm pretty sure the apocalypse's four horsemen and the four books in the Twilight series are related.

Tis better to have loved and unfollowed than never to have followed at all.

We ranked above the US and the UK in terms of gender equality! I feel empowered :)  http://huff.to/WIyO8N 

NO TWITTER! One does not send tweets to Facebook. Close friends and family do not care about my thoughts as much as random people do.

This new year, let us resolve to never use the word "totes" because, a: it isn't a word and b: your mom.

I'm not saying Tom Cruise is short, but they did a pretty good job of making that mini golf course look life size #MissionImpossible

If our tweets are going to be censored, please can we convince government that the Kardashians are a threat to the country?

Apparently, creating an "In My Boyfriend's Pants" #new4sq location and checking into it is considered "un-ladylike behavior".

I can tell from your stream that you're menstro-tweeting so I'm going to ignore you for 3-5 days.

Stop going on about Lady Gaga's dress. Really people. Like you haven't seen herpes dressed as lamb before...

This Oscar story is really sad :( So is the "shoot first, question later" mentality. Four times? Are things worth killing people over?

#YOLO (You only live online)