Thanks for the pick @god__damn_robin no guy will let a jar get the best of him.  http://favstar.fm/t/335314030128422912 …

Hey thanks for the cup @themichaelrock next beer is on me.

Stand up for kindness, because hate is way too easy to follow.

In case you don’t know, if a guy says you wanna hang out? It really means fuck…now you know.

Tell him you love him…that fucks him up.

We all have those friends that post their relationship status on FB and know it will change to ‘single’ in a month or less.

Thank you for the cup @_wangwe those facebook relationship status don’t mean shit…they change every month.

I respectfully disagree is just a nice way of saying: Fuck You.

If love was simple, everyone would do it.

I hate it when I could’ve used my sarcasm on somebody that appreciated it.

If nobody lied, we’d all be a bunch of happy motherfuckers with no questions.

Who needs that.

I like to tweet this time of night because people up at this time seem to get my fucked up sense of humor.

It’s not you, it’s me…just kidding, it was totally you.

Thanks for the pick @insideyoursoul1 and for still Rting my fucken face.  http://favstar.fm/t/335980877010042880 …

Sometimes I randomly text: “You were great in bed, doctor said my bumps will go away soon” just to spice up the weekend.

I respect those that say they’re married here, but those that pretend they’re not can go fuck themselves.

You people that use an avi of your children and tweet sexual tweets creep me the fuck out.

Just bend over, we’ll talk about it later.

You look amazing in that dress, but I like it better when all you’re wearing is that tattoo.

I like the fact that people that have unfollowed me still have to see my fucken face because the awesome people RT me.