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RIP Megaupload. Let us have 72 minutes of silence, followed by a 30 minute waiting period before we can continue our mourning </3
if any of you join a "surviving the earthquake" related facebook group i will personally come to your house and stab you in the head
If I die and people post statuses about me on Facebook acting like they knew me or were nice to me, I will come back and fucking murder them
MISSING DOG. GOLDEN RETRIEVER. DROMANA AREA. VERY FRIENDLY. ANSWERS TO 'ZOEY' OR 'BIG DOG' CONTACT 0433147007 PLEASE RT pic.twitter.com/IcwkAPwe
the movie Taken is literally just Finding Nemo with fewer hilarious underwater shenanigans
today Dad drove past my sister walking home and stopped to give her a lift, except it wasn't my sister and the girl called the police #oops
@sunriseon7 much rather a dog sitting next to me at a cafe/pub than a screaming child, time to catch up with the rest of the world Australia
People who drink decaffeinated coffee: what is your life about? Are you the same weirdos who buy alcohol-free wine?
Next time you see a SkinnyMe Tea transformation photo, just picture all those hot, skinny bitches explosively shitting all morning
SELLING PYRAMID ROCK 3 DAY CAMPING PASS FOR $200 (100 less than retail price) MOVING OVERSEAS NEED TO SELL ASAP! PLEASE RETWEET
Memo to Greece: alcohol actually does cost money and this may have had something to do with your debt crisis #SBSEurovision
Thank you for the retweets! After 32 terrifying hours, Zoey somehow made her way back home safe & sound 😘🐶 pic.twitter.com/Qt32rtnM
I'll never understand why people "can't" swallow tablets. How do you ingest your food, through your nose? IT'S THE SAME
i wonder if cyclone yasi will be as fun and exciting as Yahtzee - the ultimate dice game of all time
Hey @northkorea please don't start a war, I'm too privileged to live on rations #qanda