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GOD BLESS really detailed indexes
The four days we have off for Easter are coincidentally the four days out of the year I don't regret going to a Catholic school
I hope these super cool guys blasting their bass at 8pm understand how incredibly super cool and non-idiotic everyone thinks they are
Just realized I went through a security checkpoint today with like three razors blades in my purse so I guess I look really nonthreatening?
I have a mole on my armpit and that's why I already know I'm dying alone
Can't wait to spend my first tax refund on cookies and video games like a real adult
Not being able to buy alcohol was cute when I was five but now it's just getting ridiculous
They say to write what you know so I'm writing this paper on responsibility.
If there's one thing I know it's how to pretend to give a fuck
I'll never understand people who say "cukes," like would it kill you to add two syllables and sound infinitely less gross?
Spent a solid twenty seconds trying to figure out if Palm Sunday was today or yesterday. I am the future of the nation!