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Before I do anything stupid, I'm drunk locking my phone again.
swallow bitch, there's people starving in Africa!
Ive seen you with clothes on, this is just awkward.
She drove a knife straight through my heart. So I drove a Volvo straight through her living room.
I just typed confucked instead of confused... I think I may have a fucking problem with saying the word fuck.
Its funny how new wounds can open up old scars.
There is this thing called morning, and I would be completely ok with never seeing it again.
Well, I've decided to go on a killing spree. A big one.
I want a black mini cooper, a tiny black car to compliment my giant white cock!
Congratulations to Amy Winehouse, two weeks sober today. lol
Moving to Russia. Fuck you bitches!
Why do people always say that people never change, but when asked why the relationship ended, u werent the person they fell in love with?
note to self, dont let someone who had just drank a half bottle of tequila cut your hair... Especially if said person is you...
"I once was in love, but love's fuckin' blind"
Strange mood tonight... don't really feel like drinking... this is a first...
When the bartender texts you and says he misses you, does that mean you have a drinking problem?
I will humiliate myself to incriminate others.
The end is never the end.
A new challenge awaits.
A test no man could be prepared for.
A new hell he must conquer and destroy.
drinking kool aid and smoking a cigar... There is something wrong here. lol
My life is what I make it. I fuck up, I do stupid shit, and I have a great time doing it. Judge me if you want, I don't care.