"@googlefacts: Did you know that when someone appears in your dreams, it's because that person misses you. - Psychological fact." #BULLSHIT

@retweetdares for those who don't believe us. Retweet this so they know http://t.co/IIwsPGCX @palyoubeensky

"@factboook: Horrible musicians were tortured in medieval times." So botdf would be pretty screwed, ain't?

"@badadvicenurse: Can vegans swallow their own saliva or do they have to spit it all out?" @staygolddreamer

Well touch me in the shower! Jerry Sandusky is still trending!

Diane is definitely one of the nicest people I know.

"@y_u_nooo: #HEYJUSTIN, MILLIONS OF GIRLS WANT U, Y U NO FIND SOMEBODY TO LOVE YET?" Prob cause none of them are willing to wear a strap-on.

Mini earthquake? I would've preferred a mini blizzard, oreo flavored.

Good luck, WBC. Don't fuck with Slayer fans. pic.twitter.com/BpUbxVpShM

Kitty's new avi doe

Trump should sue Black Veil Brides next. Not that they did anything illegal, they're just God awful.

#YoureMoreAttractiveIf you don't freak out if I hang out with my friends who are of the opposite gender

Hail Satan

If @craigowens followed me, I'd run around in the snow in my boxers and take video as proof #FollowMeCraig

#MentionSomeonePretty @yelyahwilliams

#ToMyFutureSon you'll always have my love and support with whatever you decide to do with your life

"@time4depression
It looks like happiness might finally be within your grasp. Just kidding, you’re doomed." For once, this account is wrong.

#Congrats1D Hey @dictatorhitler where's their victory shower?

Every time I'm not with somebody in person, I think they talk about me with other people

If you wanna talk shit on me, learn how to NOT save your email and password in my browser history #dumbass