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Is being bored of the internet a sign of dying?
accidentally fell asleep during a susan sontag documentary. so yeah, tonight is gonna be wild
Don't forget to tweet all the stupid things your parents say this week, you horrible children.
"Hey Rudolph, I found a way to make your physical abnormality work for me!"
If I get on another subway train that is pumping AC, New York will burn.
Great news! The US Airways/ American Airlines merger makes it easier for all the clientele to miss 80% the flights. Instead of the usual 10%
If you have decorated your car for Christmas, today's a good day to drive it off a cliff.
Simplify your Christmas shopping by completely alienating everyone in your life.
He knows when you are sleeping, he knows when you're awake, he knows if you've been bad or good, Santa is a police state
Comedian • Airing LIVE daily 8:30AM http://people.com • Contributor @Someecards • curlycomedy on Instagram • Watch a funny satire I'm in: