@dogboner Unfollowed. Also, die.

@capricecrane He then texted "... smile was what attracted me to you," but it was too late. She had already blocked his number.

@spectrumheart @bassplyr5150 @amandapalmer If it IS identifiable by your mother, I think there are serious questions you must ask her.

I'd like to nominate the Nobel Peace Prize Committee for a Nobel Peace Prize for their work in promoting peace. The time is now.

This is the coolest thing. RT @newsycombinator: Godel Escher Bach QR Code shadow cube  http://j.mp/uixNug 

@selenacoppock @teapartycat I bet he listens to Rush, too. (The band, that is.)

BREAKING: The House of Blues and The House of Pancakes have announced a merger. They will now be known as The House of Blueberry Pancakes.

What is the height of hypocrisy? I mean, how tall is Sarah Palin, anyway?

I read the news today: Protesters abused by the authorities in Syria, Egypt, and Oakland. #IRTNT #OO #OPD #OccupyOakland #p2

Rick Snyder turns the Banality of Evil into the Ennui of Eh. RT @lolgop: http://t.co/ujkEyun4

I don't want to alarm anyone, but the Greeks have left a big, wooden horse outside the European Central Bank. #eurozone #ECB

I'm RTing, please poop. RT @michaelianblack RT @elibraden I'm pooping. Please RT

How Sebastian Thrun plans to fix Computer Science. cc @udacity  http://pandodaily.com/2013/04/29/how-sebastian-thrun-plans-to-fix-computer-science/ …

@billntwrkbill @joshmalina It's okay, Bill, no one thinks less of you for being so frightened. You're obviously a very fearful guy.

I know that Spenser, Hawk, Frank Belson, and Marty Quirk would make quick work of the bastards who did this.

@sonjablair Randsplaining.

@daveweasel It is 25 anniversary?

@teapartycat United Colors of Photoshop.

@pourmecoffee He went medieval and replaced their shingled roof with thatch.

Because of cuts under the sequester, I'm not wearing any pants. #Sequester