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Never meet NPR hosts.
Feeling sorry for actors in KFC commercials.
New followers, I am on Lexapro now and my tweets are hit or miss. Anyone will tell you. Your funeral.
Everyday you get to decide if you'll be using the hashtag that promotes social justice or the punny meaningless game show one.
Don't blame me. I voted for non-perpetual war.
IF YOU ARE A CAT OR DOG WITH CRISPY THINGS IN YOUR EYES LET ME GET THEM FOR YOU I LOVE YOU
Earth Day is planetist. I am a citizen of the universe.
Calm down, "Previously on Mad Men" voice guy.
A shaft of sunlight just showed me how much airborne cat hair I regularly inhale.
Tarzan should have had a beard. (Please, no wags carping "Its name was Jane." Thank you.)
Wait, unfunny tweets get NO stars? Since when? Twitter, you used to be cool.
Watching The Hobbit. Glad to see it's faithful to all of Tolkien's soaring, vertiginous establishing shots.
My mom invited me to LinkedIn! Happy Easter!
Do you set down your empty shopping basket with the handles leaning in so the next basket can't be stacked inside? See you in hell, creep.
Thought experiment: what possible game could I have which would steal away a DJ's girlfriend.
If someone likes me, I assume something must be wrong with them. If a lot of people like me, now we're getting somewhere.