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Happy Independence Day. Or as dogs call it, Terrible Boom Boom Nightmare Day.
There's a product called Double Stuf Oreo Cakesters. That sounds like something dreamed up by a bunch of fat kids on a mandatory hike.
The only survivor of both the Hiroshima and Nagasaki atom bombs has died at 93. WE GOT HIM! WE FINALLY GOT HIM! USA! USA!
Nobody has been subjected to more belting out of "Rolling in the Deep" than the inside of a black Jetta.
While you were sleeping #eastwooding peaked, got old, the times wrote a piece about it, it got a tv deal, and the tv show was just cancelled
4 scientists did a report on the physics of the batcape. Oh, I didn't realize we ALREADY CURED ALL DISEASES AND ALSO PLANET STUFF
Pot! Gay marriage! Lesbian senator! Black president! AMERICA IS A AWESOME SEXY PARTY
Sorry, gotta share a killer line I just wrote for my Taken sequel: "Dad, I have bad news. I got taken. Again."
"Let's Tetris this sitch." -cool way to talk about a situation where you have to tightly arrange different configurations of colored blocks
Saw two ladies at a cafe having dessert before their meal. One said to the other "I won't tell if you won't tell." WELL I'M TELLING, LADIES
No, I don't want fucking red velvet, are you crazy? It's 2012 get that fucking red velvet out of my fucking face you fucking idiot
If your restaurant's "thing" is garlic bread, 1) your restaurant sucks, and 2) I love your restaurant.
Something no actual nerd has ever said: "I'm such a nerd."
How old does a movie have to be to be considered a classic? Having an argument about The Lincoln Lawyer. (Also how good does it have to be?)
Don't know anything about The King's Peach but as a huge fan of peaches I bought out the whole theater. Here we go, very excited
Hollywood is pretty freaking weird. That's why I call it Weirdywood.
If this were an 80's sitcom, Obama and Boehner would look down and realize their daughters solved the debt crisis yesterday.
If Mitt Romney gets elected, would he be our first President who nobody in the world likes even a little bit?
Denizen of Hollyweird. Fueled by the drippings of a dark tropical bean.