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Though I can't invite all of you to my wedding, I still want to share my STD with you. Maybe it'll go viral? http://vimeo.com/63197964
Are people who are against gay marriage against it because they're worried that they'll be forced to get gay married once it's legalized?
The best part about Cougar Town's Season 5 pick-up is the potential for fan-favorite character "Guy at Bar" to return. Right, @vdoozer?
Really happy that Cougar Town will be back for Season 5. Maybe I can finally convince @vdoozer to hear out my "Tom Goes to Space" idea...?
Here's episode 1 of The Tom Show, a web series I co-wrote for @cougartowntbs starring the brilliant @bobclendenin: http://goo.gl/tSRzK
Could my 1 line on tonight's episode of #CougarTownTBS change the course of history for the show? Tune in @ 10/9c & find out. (Spoiler: No.)
If the movie/show/book/play you are writing is slow and boring, just call it a character study.
Hey, it's your grandma's birthday. Don't forget to call her. (This tweet won't apply to everyone, but to someone out there, you're welcome.)
The craft service truck for @cougartowntbs is playing Sting's "Desert Rose" for the third time today. Considering quitting.
In "In The Air Tonight" when Phil Collins sings "I've been waiting for this moment for all my life" is he talking about that drum fill part?
Everyone is sooo worried about Carmageddon but I haven't heard anyone yet mention Deep Impala.
If you're trying to spot celebrities in public, just look for the people wearing a baseball hat and sunglasses who look they shouldn't be.
Today is National Talk Like a Pirate Day! To celebrate, I'm uploading a pretty decent copy of The Dark Knight Rises.
The news wasn't ALL bad for Mitt Romney this week. I heard he found a dollar!
If you're going to take the time, effort and risk to be a cat burglar, why not go for some dogs too?
Which would the Prophet Mohammed find more offensive: violent riots around the world or his image portrayed in a lousy YouTube video?
This is my six word autobiography.
