Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
Let's just say that I'm somewhere and I'm stoned.
Wait, I'm confused... Do people really buy followers?!
Back to the real world now. Apparently my real world has time for twitter. That's cool right?
Let's smoke some weed and then make out.
Patience is really hard to practice when you're talking about sex.
to all of my many many twitter friends (ha), im going to be a grandmother! this is my 1st official announcement. yeah, my cat is a slut.
Somewhere, some girl really is knocked up but she's definitely not trying to tell her man today.
I just took one of those silly "tests" that asks 6 questions and then apparently guesses your age from your answers. I got 61. Seems legit.
It's okay to subtweet to someone that isn't following you or isn't even on Twitter, right?
I haven't smoked pot all day. Technically.
Your avi better be a realistic portrayal of what you look like in RL or you can't be trusted! ...I'll still laugh if you're funny, though.
Silently quitting your shitty job is a interesting way to conclude a Friday, I guess.
Hey, I know that I'm funny. I don't need you to tell me. Fuck you.
You can't get mad at someone if you like them and they don't like you back, right? I think so... In other words, please stop being a dick.
My cat got her own Instagram today. That is all.
Whoa, starfucking just got a whole lot more intense... Wham bam
In other words, I am smoking a bowl and rambling about nothing important.
ganja cookies. nom nom nom.
I just got overemotional and started crying over the idea of getting a puppy and then having it die someday. And I'm not even on my period.
You sound like an alcoholic when you're always talking about drinking. A stoner just sounds like a stoner when talking about weed endlessly.