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Let's just say that I'm somewhere and I'm stoned.
Wait, I'm confused... Do people really buy followers?!
Patience is really hard to practice when you're talking about sex.
It's okay to subtweet to someone that isn't following you or isn't even on Twitter, right?
Let's smoke some weed and then make out.
to all of my many many twitter friends (ha), im going to be a grandmother! this is my 1st official announcement. yeah, my cat is a slut.
Back to the real world now. Apparently my real world has time for twitter. That's cool right?
Somewhere, some girl really is knocked up but she's definitely not trying to tell her man today.
I just took one of those silly "tests" that asks 6 questions and then apparently guesses your age from your answers. I got 61. Seems legit.
My cat got her own Instagram today. That is all.
I haven't smoked pot all day. Technically.
Your avi better be a realistic portrayal of what you look like in RL or you can't be trusted! ...I'll still laugh if you're funny, though.
Silently quitting your shitty job is a interesting way to conclude a Friday, I guess.
Hey, I know that I'm funny. I don't need you to tell me. Fuck you.
I just got overemotional and started crying over the idea of getting a puppy and then having it die someday. And I'm not even on my period.
You can't get mad at someone if you like them and they don't like you back, right? I think so... In other words, please stop being a dick.
You know what's great about having a fuck buddy?
The fucking part.
And then just chilling afterwards.
It's pretty damn amazing to me how the Twitter world just keeps spinning and spinning. Fun ride, though!
Whoa, starfucking just got a whole lot more intense... Wham bam
I put sexy underwear on for you and you somehow Fucked Up.
I prefer fire, but prepare for ice.
i do what i want. get over it. meow.
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