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Okay, we shall bug you no longer
  • daplusk
      dak @daplusk

    Gift @daplusk Favstar Pro to unlock their best tweet!Gift them Pro!

    • 4,076
    • FAVS
    appleparkkidsJuststopkatezeusbobcatthe_webslyngercchronicIedamonalbonerLaurieDuvall3quantumbliss
    • 3,511
    • RETWEETS
    jwlaryderstepLiterotica_comzeusbobcatlocolauren_destinyheyemily_da_munkeydamonalboner
    Moi_RaRacarlykenGlazerBooHooHoormfnordshwebby3TomSchallyCelebrityChezTheDailySchmuckladyfiredancerReverend_ScottMatt_The_1stlllvvvzzzbigmacherStellacopterloveletterbombslarisasaysIGotsSmartspartiallyproGhetto_TrophycurlycomedyUglyPrick________fullblowndavedoooiiiitthebombdottcomFunny2hipchkk
  • daplusk
      dak @daplusk

    Sleeping with your ex is like retweeting someone you unfollowed.

    • 1,895
    • FAVS
    silent_musingsJuststopkatetrafficparkertempeimprovNoelle_ThearNevaehFALLENPBImprovGarJennings
    • 2,643
    • RETWEETS
    Literotica_comneesyweesytempeimprovNevaehFALLENPBImprovlissagnaabuster2211ParaComedian09
    li4mst3w4rtMollyERAgwatts77SaraESpivey
  • daplusk
      dak @daplusk

    Marriage is like friends with benefits without the benefits. Or the friends

    • 1,921
    • FAVS
    zolofighterHeengHegeguidetoflightCyd10eheroinsdemisedxblarssonENGLyndiMidnightTurrraLurra
    • 1,235
    • RETWEETS
    pat_anzanellobidu676zolofighterHeengHegedumbasfiskenCyd10edxblarssonENGTurrraLurra
    dxblarssonENGQwertyJones3gerryhatricDarlainkyclemdytanGreyPath1__CherishMebigmacherPeteypops13payal_vjayneunchained____MouVanLeefluffysuse
  • daplusk
      dak @daplusk

    I'm so selfish I wear ribbed condoms inside out.

    • 2,137
    • FAVS
    JuststopkatepunmagnateSoonerjay75Whitewalk3rsLipLush1hook8669girl_a_whirlthebelleofbama
    • 984
    • RETWEETS
    ryan_rachryan80squirrel74wkgnhook8669girl_a_whirlthebelleofbamajernaliste21_2007batsflywest
    nigelgodwin_jennjennNotJustJack______ImKevinito________mugkipNotDeakins_BKL_____________iwearpajamas______
  • daplusk
      dak @daplusk

    A man died today. He wasn't famous. He wasn't rich, but he was loved. I love you dad.

    • 2,069
    • FAVS
    carlyme23thirtytwoflavrsryan_rachryan80TheAlexNevilRaylaRimpsonactivens1LipLush1girl_a_whirl
    • 893
    • RETWEETS
    ryan_rachryan80XLCadillacA2J316lucasloveslilyjamster5068BeardownBDJewelsb1980CrazzzyKen
    MSN2BEkjataylorSaraESpiveydetroit_etpeachesanscreamZeRoyalBaumer____partiallyproGHCanada__________hipchkkMoistPorkJoeyPositivityimence2RichHarris2BabetteJonesBarebakAssassinskitzoetteporkrimsen________WittyClittytdhurstllvvzz
  • daplusk
      dak @daplusk

    Studies have found that, on average, a man thinks about sex once every tits seconds.

    • 1,615
    • FAVS
    heroinsdemisedxblarssonENGJuststopkateryan_rachryan80Copy_CreatorsNotKlingonRedPinkCamoTOLipLush1
    • 692
    • RETWEETS
    dxblarssonENGryan_rachryan80joaniwalshiREnlightenmentPinkCamoTOmikeybO7chapmanj100simet9
    954LeenOGroperClevelandMothpete
  • daplusk
      dak @daplusk

    Ugly people have kids to prove they've had sex.

    • 1,241
    • FAVS
    TheLouScannonCyd10eheroinsdemisedxblarssonENGDrangulaJuststopkateryan_rachryan80DanKCharnley
    • 805
    • RETWEETS
    aditiaawandCyd10edxblarssonENGWisdomOfAPervryan_rachryan80Ze_ba9SHYAKAJOBOkhzo
    BillArrundaleJackieluvsUK
  • daplusk
      dak @daplusk

    Never trust a homeless person selling warm lemonade

    • 1,346
    • FAVS
    DickieRyderIshraQMehinnocent_bitch_heroinsdemisedxblarssonENGJuststopkateKThonvoldphilEfanaddict
    • 684
    • RETWEETS
    DickieRyderkrisbensondxblarssonENGphilEfanaddictReadingParadoxryan_rachryan80batsflywestXLCadillac
    wesjohnson8jamieramonemazizkhalifa
  • daplusk
      dak @daplusk

    I nod and smile at empty places just to confuse any ghosts that might be there into thinking i can see them.

    • 1,207
    • FAVS
    dxblarssonENGRhiii_EdzJustCallMeFrankPolygameistdreamthievinAnnette_Wetzelsilent_musingsJuststopkate
    • 682
    • RETWEETS
    focobudzMrsBaker420Polygameistsilent_musingskapils2116palwashaminhasRizwanPehelwanucanthandlem3
    brennadineBruceForce
  • daplusk
      dak @daplusk

    I look forward to the day when people will only know Cancer as a Zodiac sign

    • 1,059
    • FAVS
    MockingCher_20learningromaniaonelucky15heroinsdemisedxblarssonENGDrangulaHuwLaytonryan_rachryan80
    • 570
    • RETWEETS
    onelucky15dxblarssonENGHuwLaytonryan_rachryan80PinkCamoTOTanzeel_Akhtardom_justintimeXLCadillac
    LackOfShametayandmae_jennjennKadayo_TakaminiBacon_Ball________GetCougarizedElifcelloletsdancebitchsxxprettymuchthejonjohnPurpleReyn
  • daplusk
      dak @daplusk

    To all the doubters who said that I'd never be able to write a joke about Bukkake:

    In your face!

    • 1,023
    • FAVS
    DETN8StephAxilolnikwikCubanCigarJrjpeek01brinigulcarlyme23DanKCharnley
    • 378
    • RETWEETS
    __JustBea_carlyme23tiReynard_L1vY_T_N_Crumpetswendysredryonarcherenemybsnc64
    zachheltzelredpawn3HeyZeus666
  • daplusk
      dak @daplusk

    Nothing worse than an idiot with a valid point

    • 822
    • FAVS
    jayonguitarJTQuestrachel2manypawsAuburnKellyDeadLeaFMothe21_2007elisa_2120071shirlthegirl
    • 578
    • RETWEETS
    JTQuestrachel2manypawstherobshowliveelisa_212007BangYouBabyharshmishra13hippocroteezVips_k
    kate_smithxxwriterPTbeefman138Darlainky
  • daplusk
      dak @daplusk

    Love is when there is no "wrong hole."

    • 909
    • FAVS
    DrangulaPuchynatorJuststopkateDanKCharnleyLipLush1offshore122PolhunterPBigLoveTX77
    • 327
    • RETWEETS
    PuchynatorJuststopkateoffshore122Curly_gurl135tiReynardT_N_Crumpetswendysredryonarcherenemy
    Bathing_in_Sin____
  • daplusk
      dak @daplusk

    If Tom Hanks signature doesn't read as "THanks" he is an idiot.

    • 795
    • FAVS
    DrangulajaynecomplainslawdcheesycrustHuajatollaChicflashytrashDanKCharnleyerinchiladaeliassen_mel
    • 424
    • RETWEETS
    MonaMerissahipnhopejaynecomplainsGamersRespawnHuajatollaChicheathercamffflashytrashDestineyLynn
    adamlucidiYouFuckingWon
  • daplusk
      dak @daplusk

    Statistically if driving a stake through the heart kills vampires, we're all vampires.

    • 558
    • FAVS
    Drangulasilent_musingspsychopathrafGabeSwanson14Melzie55GoKaargoWalkingCivilWarninabuttmonkey
    • 331
    • RETWEETS
    bawsee_laydeeknottyk0lexubanms_sarraahWalkingCivilWarCobyJobkarAMP_MILITANTa297d8b38459429
    blood_orphan
  • daplusk
      dak @daplusk

    Foreplay is like eating with a formal dinner setting. You start from the outside and work your way in.

    • 683
    • FAVS
    DrangulaDanKCharnleyLipLush1ICountBeanssJohnnyCrash5kid0krewwendysredryongerryhatric
    • 121
    • RETWEETS
    wendysredryonarcherenemybsnc64biggarfdPiratePrincessvelvettuskJ_IllunninatibrokeMD__
    kattcalls________
  • daplusk
      dak @daplusk

    Today HR told me that I constantly misinterpret what people say as being sexual and I need to stop or I will be sacked

    She wants to fuck me

    • 600
    • FAVS
    silent_musingsDanKCharnleyLipLush1JohnnyCrash5brain_omenMrBrown419Miss_Kris85itsmetrb
    • 183
    • RETWEETS
    brain_omenZacThillitsmetrbRuinMyWeekSinfulShellywendysredryonarcherenemybsnc64
    KhrisWordsPeaceInTruth1
  • daplusk
      dak @daplusk

    I bet the guy who invented cursive writing was drunk.

    • 485
    • FAVS
    bakonutPiplee1234Drangulasilent_musingsHeyZeus666ASelfeDanKCharnleyrockthechuck
    • 294
    • RETWEETS
    bakonutPiplee1234karnagie_mtsjohnbla43361534LipLush1Jodi_GoertzjergarlNicoleBidon
    ElgatoEsmio
  • daplusk
      dak @daplusk

    Maybe it's not wind. Maybe trees wave because they're lonely.

    • 430
    • FAVS
    DrangulaHumor_FetishJaneBadallMindless4MilesladyfiredancerWildeThingyKhushmeenBDanKCharnley
    • 332
    • RETWEETS
    wimothyjosephMindless4MilesladyfiredancerHitikshaTalrejaSMittenbySMonenaveeniiumsoftdrink77wendysredryon
  • daplusk
      dak @daplusk

    Had sex with a transvestite the other day.

    She took it like a man.

    • 565
    • FAVS
    DanKCharnleyLipLush1SamPollack98Solar_CrawlerhymennnisdeadhstweetheartDrTrotsJuceeRob
    • 139
    • RETWEETS
    hsskiteammascotUncutDREWleryAwpalotI_am_DoodleQwertyJones3squirrel74wkgnwendysredryonarcherenemy
@daplusk

@daplusk

https://twitter.com/search?q=from%3Adaplusk&src=typd&vertical=default&f=tweets

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