@willmcavoyacn I’m more worried by the implication that Romney may believe oxygen will somehow help in a fire.

They’re just making up countries now.

I wonder if the Romneys have to fight with their insurance company like my parents do for my mom’s MS medicine.

Hipster Jesus died for sins you’ve never heard of.

Hey, everyone complaining about Netflix, have you seen the price of milk lately? Fucking dairy farmers, right?

Ring of fire. http://t.co/hAhdY427

Got one. #TransitofVenus http://t.co/WvDG1In9

I'm a little bit country. No. Tired. Little bit tired. Almost zero country.

I changed my avatar AND I boycott Chik-fil-a. I’M LITERALLY ALMOST HARVEY MILK.

Whatever your stance on the second amendment, how about universal mental health care so people can fix their issues instead of exploding?

Holy shit. It just occurred to me that Japan needs to get all reptiles away from that reactor.

I like my women like I like my C# code: undocumented and a complete mystery as to why I went that way to begin with.

The best thing about having ADHD is never having to say, "Yeah, I heard you the first time."

@imkristenbell you better buy a goddamn pony with some of that money.

I think I'm baby-hungry.



Wait. Nope. Just regular hungry.

40 years ago we put a man on the moon but we *still* have to put up with the bullshit called 'mornings'. WTF.

If your candidate lose an election and all you can see is doom and the end of America, back the fuck up and take a look at reality.

God sure took his time punishing New York for the Book of Mormon musical.

I'm hungry. And I like games. This seems perfect.

Alcohol makes it all better. Like prayer used to.