@dastardlydeed's (Mrs. J) most faved Tweets...
your daughters are named desiree,lacy, and angel. what are you trying to raise, a team of strippers?
boy #1 outsmarted us by blocking the schools phone number on our phones. i dont know whether to punish him or give him a hi-5
i swear to god, if santa doesnt bring me the margarita machine this year, christmas is cancelled. for good.
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Thought for the day... Sometimes the one you think is your knight in shining armour might actually turn out to be a retard in tinfoil.
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boy#1 just informed me that he took one of his dads MRE's to school because they were better than school lunch.that i pay $4 a day for...
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MIL: you know youd probably feel a lot better if you stopped taking that medication.little does she know-shes the reason i started taking it
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I love that we all complain about snow shoveling, low temps (15 degrees here) and freezing pipes, yet we don't move
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“Whenever I am about to do something, I think: would an idiot do that? And if they would, I do not do that thing.” Dwight Shrute
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weeding:if I have to really yank on it,it's a weed.if it slips right out of the dirt its something I planted&want to stay there.Why is that?
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