Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
challenging you to a wasabi eating contest
Sometimes being able to persuasively argue both sides of an argument is a curse.
I wonder if my cat realizes she has to walk on my head an hour earlier in the morning now.
So cool. Do you live in cali?
"Father it's been 6 months since my last confession"
"Go on, my child"
"I told Sharon I'd tell John she said hi. I never did"
i told the cat how upset i am and all he's doing is showing me his butt
even Lindsay can't find an apartment in New York City. ban NYC
For take your daughter to work day my dad called in sick & we went & saw Pulp Fiction which was pretty much the blueprint for my entire life
WHY IS EVERYONE FROM HIGH SCHOOL HAVING CHILDREN NOW STOP THAT STRAIGHT PEOPLE ARE SO CONFUSING
im at carl's junior, asking the tough questions: does carl own junior
Is there not a single charity that will give Matt Yglesias a disposable razor? Is Stubhub that kind of charity??
You know what didn't crash tonight? The ability to have conversations with real people, said a guy who no TV who everyone hated.
hey future employers I definitely didn't smoke any weed and think the world was made of wallpaper last month
What the fuck? I thought Cosmo's was a Seinfeld spinoff about Kramer buying the coffee shop!
I'm not too smart for a butterfly tattoo.
Another good name for your belly is "boob couch."
I'd like my obituary to be Iris DeMent singing my most embarrassing moments
Just a dead man walkin thru the dead of night
WHAT IS Donni Saphire? WHO ARE standup, open mics, sketches and scripts? WHY DOES Chicago, most nights, for you? OK!