Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
Fuck it, I'm running for mayor.
what kind of supermarket closes at 8pm anyway
*pounds fists on desk*
DAMN, I HATE DESKS!
I guess I'm up for the day whatever.
I likey to ask my sex partner if he "likey" or remain silent.
Hi, I'm Trent Bossman. Thanks for coming in for the interview, although I should let you know I'm already fucking your wife and you're fired
In the future the tooth fairy has a pink streak in her hair, a shiny black vinyl skirt and she pays you in bitcoin. She has rollerblades 2.
Turn down for what? Idk, Lil Jon, how about The Lord?
It's one of those sunglasses, raincoat, skis hedge-your-bets Irish weather days.
My pussy tastes like mountain dew. Sometimes it tastes like mountain dew code red
I like to imagine kanye & lana nodding at each other
My family tree just looks like a stick man making out with himself.
לא בטוחה אם אני בפקק ארוך או במערכת העיכול של חנה לאסלו.
Behind every strong women is a bunch of shitty guys she passed on dating.
Ugh. A swaggy 7-11 guy. What'll the universe think of next.
talking about how much u love alcohol & drinking alcohol is such a great stand-in for, like, actually having a personality
Told my friend today's severed penis story, mentioned the Wu-Tang Clan, her 11-year old son said "The guys with white hoods on their faces?"
He was buried in the back of a popular fast food chain. He was left for dead. Now, he's back and wearing a cowboy hat.
Arby's: The Movie.
Beanies only look good on thugs and hot chicks. The rest of us just look cold.
WHAT IS Donni Saphire? WHO ARE standup, open mics, sketches and scripts? WHY DOES Chicago, most nights, for you? OK!