Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
My inner child is still waiting at the bus stop in the rain for the short bus to arrive.
It's hard to be nostalgic when you can't remember anything.
I would like to thank all of you who keep it real for me, by stopping at 9 stars.
Stand by your Man #songsyoudontwannahearinjail
It's your god. They're your rules. *You* go to hell.
My self-loathing just told my buddhism to go fuck itself. My buddhism was greatful and thanked my self-loathing for the good advice.
I told my daughter to break up with her loser boyfriend today. She said she was going to her room and wasn't coming out for a week. #bonus
How many stars a day do I get with this job offer?
Whenever I try to make a dramatic exit I always forget my keys, and then my wallet, and my sunglasses, and oh yeah my iPhone.
I thought they put covers on books SO I could judge them... :/
Drop a grudge if you're holding one, that shit's too fucking heavy.
Looking for the truth on twitter is like looking for an unopened box of Twinkies at a fat kid's house.
I'm getting emergency inflatable exit slides installed in my house and vehicles. I'm still looking for one to install in a conversation.
Travel deep within until you find the voice you remember as your own.
Fuck the future like there's no tomorrow.
Every time I lose a bot a little piece of me dies.
Fuck You Brown Rice. Turn into something useful, like Chocolate.
My Gram taught me to drive a stick on the highway at age 8 She also taught me that it was OK to say Mother-Fucker to anyone except my Mother
The future is like the present, only longer.
I just finished installing a surveillance system in my home. I feel really safe now. I can watch myself while watching TV.