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  • dril
      wint @dril

    if your grave doesnt say "rest in peace" on it you are automatically drafted into the skeleton war

    • 8,580
    • FAVS
    RymdemannentaylorgayngZachary_Eatonbadluckbreeding_postMattInAGlassjackcphelpssnovvvhite
    • 7,520
    • RETWEETS
    tyrionIannisterdarthjaderteenagecholabadluckbreeAntDiPalmateethfallingoutding_postMattInAGlass
    FuckTypingAmSockoctoqtshruglorddavedittell
  • dril
      wint @dril

    Food $200
    Data $150
    Rent $800
    Candles $3,600
    Utility $150
    someone who is good at the economy please help me budget this. my family is dying

    • 6,400
    • FAVS
    dogbertcosplayHommusapienBlindChowEdsonOSXa_cute_bugBenevanstanchaTheConley4yourHELL
    • 4,154
    • RETWEETS
    michaeldgnroEdsonOSX4yourHELLyallmusbgaysinol_KonyMandelaLeanSalesman1v1rustfaggot
    vapelord69
  • dril
      wint @dril

    big bird was obviously just a man in a suit. but the other ones were too small to contain men. so what the fuck

    • 6,280
    • FAVS
    Sammy_MoMopunmagnateAlHumphriesDrLickensteintyrionIannisterkrelbelsadieolson_archemarche
    • 3,748
    • RETWEETS
    ProfaneDaneDrLickensteinfilmnoirxDrTracksuitjadelynfordaysPatDoran69lizardmcguireTRASHBlN
    yeahsometimesJermHimselfishDickPicSender
  • dril
      wint @dril

    another day volunteering at the betsy ross museum. everyone keeps asking me if they can fuck the flag. buddy, they wont even let me fuck it

    • 5,390
    • FAVS
    tyrionIannisterSmokeyQRiversSlewFootersjozsereyesshutupmikeginncorporationdudeThree_Ninjassuperkamio
    • 2,543
    • RETWEETS
    bread_thingCarlRadbunnypanicattacking_victanolhugecargoshortsYAO_LOLDribblesHansenCumWitch
    z_a_c_h_k_a_t_zironisktvitBeverlyCleary69lawblobshruglordAmSockactualjellyfishGarbageMysticgubbinsgubbins____
  • dril
      wint @dril

    the doctor reveals my blood pressure is 420 over 69. i hoot & holler outta the building while a bunch of losers try to tell me that im dying

    • 4,455
    • FAVS
    huhpoofkrelbelSlewFootersjozsereyeskylerselbypanicattacking_haunterdadvictanol
    • 3,082
    • RETWEETS
    yungbasedNaOHcooperlundMichaelTFHSlewFootersadamgethinpanicattacking_haunterdadvictanol
    R_Schmittyoctoqtmojo_ca
  • dril
      wint @dril

    fuck "jokes". everything i tweet is real. raw insight without the horse shit. no, i will NOT follow trolls. twitter dot com. i live for this

    • 4,494
    • FAVS
    SweetNAwfulvelferdsguttenloatherchillacySamFactotumGloverTroyoranmackechnietsayvs
    • 2,859
    • RETWEETS
    ChavyRenoLeanSalesmanPlankfanCremisiFeniceDeath_Insuranced__myrvictanolbenjiclayton
    lesterfreamonsunfilterlanyardiganJermHimselfishCoolBabyRatoctoqtSimon_BarrettpissGoblinAceMakesWordslosdrogasHermit_Thrushi_have_4_dickslawblobfartLindzetadisaster_dogjitkavincenessrare_basementSlennon_
  • dril
      wint @dril

    BOSS TELLS ME I CAN KISS MY FERRETS AT WORK, BUT NO OPEN MOUTH. I PUNCH THE FLOOR SO HARD HIS SCREEN SAVER DEACTIVATES

    • 4,441
    • FAVS
    CornOnTheGoblinilayewTim_FromAmericacjubarringtonkyliemegdayFelSopranoSnoopBradleyjwoodham
    • 2,477
    • RETWEETS
    ilayewHoite89MeatyPunkANALyticAPrioriblink_clyr0panicattacking_MNXVIII_69JerGordondotcom
    DamnItsTrillUpturnedBathtubEvaGisellebriangaarneatdeerGHOSTBONESrobfeefartslimepuke
  • dril
      wint @dril

    The reason the "Cars" movies have gained so much popularity is becuase the cars speak to one another. You don't get that with real life cars

    • 4,027
    • FAVS
    HeelyRiddlerdogbertcosplaykirabiraidioteque95daylenyanggabughaidakylevenatashantone
    • 2,728
    • RETWEETS
    LeanSalesmantyrionIannisterAlecButModarn__idioteque95AntDiPalmakyleveJeremyTylerGvictanol
    DavidRaymondT__
  • dril
      wint @dril

    "This Whole Thing Smacks Of Gender," i holler as i overturn my uncle's barbeque grill and turn the 4th of July into the 4th of Shit

    • 3,695
    • FAVS
    ian_suxxxxKatraHighergodlrod2panicattacking_lifeisadonutgriffin_so_coolsteveroggenbuckunintelligibl3
    • 2,636
    • RETWEETS
    sus_as_helllifeisadonutweed_mouseDrewJacobsenpartiepigheape22NielJacobyspurlygurlz
    earfdaeoctoqtloveletterbombs
  • dril
      wint @dril

    awfully bold of you to fly the Good Year blimp on a year that has been extremely bad thus far

    • 3,407
    • FAVS
    Kimberrrrrrrrpernille_bpHellaKetchupjacksonroyehipstersandwichbug_emailstobykeithsweatjshbck
    • 2,061
    • RETWEETS
    viljesvagthebirdroadsKimberrrrrrrrrorymalDrewLogbug_emailscultevasionporkskin_nips
  • dril
      wint @dril

    i get dozens of compliments about my perfect ears every day. it's llike Shut the fuck up. Im trying to eat a bagel in my car and you do this

    • 3,691
    • FAVS
    SamSesekmj_cIarkCornOnTheGoblinryannoyedswishybigmacdefaultxrTomHanksIsHotkawaiilie
    • 1,704
    • RETWEETS
    snatchaweaveryannoyedthin_citiesNlNACOLADAsavxnnastyRevolvtionsteethfallingoutAntDiPalma
  • dril
      wint @dril

    "Is Wario A Libertarian" - the greatest thread in the history of forums, locked by a moderator after 12,239 pages of heated debate,

    • 3,075
    • FAVS
    adamdorseyelevatortmculturalfatwaBest_Porn_TitlePT_Swagbag93grimbosafariZachary_Eatonclani_
    • 2,235
    • RETWEETS
    culturalfatwaPT_Swagbag93joflorescbluntswdadTasteChickenNielJacobyInMyExperienceWillOrCiaran
    bugpunchSweetTweetsBROpjlynchshruglordactualjellyfishWeedCoffin
  • dril
      wint @dril

    AS THE GUILLOTINE SLIDES TOWARDS MY NECK, I PRODUCE A TINY BARBELL I'VE BEEN HIDING IN MY MOUTH AND LIFT IT WITH MY TONGUE. ONE LAST REP

    • 3,466
    • FAVS
    krelbelian_suxxxxjozsereyesMeatyPunkhamskiipanicattacking_RickshawCrawlifeisadonut
    • 1,824
    • RETWEETS
    JeremyTylerGpanicattacking_RickshawCrawlifeisadonutsIeepyweepypeachhugsToastCrustDrewJacobsen
    buttcafe
  • dril
      wint @dril

    two men emerge from sensory deprivation tanks
    "I just attained oneness with all living beings"
    "I just fucked the Girl rabbit from SpaceJam"

    • 3,539
    • FAVS
    weirdokaymad0mGobroksdpatrickgmr_bobloblawSlewFootersMeatyPunkCabetoMejia
    • 1,625
    • RETWEETS
    LeanSalesmanBlackHawk4744panicattacking_hugecargoshortsIrateGamerShowtwelverpeeberMackerelSodagermknodels
    AmSock
  • dril
      wint @dril

    i call evbery four-legged animal I see a dog and I am correct more often than not so I will never stop

    • 3,202
    • FAVS
    neonblackfutureBooky_McReaderjshbckpitaherceSamSeseksabinathegreatpugDNAding_post
    • 1,893
    • RETWEETS
    MikeMoschettoWastelandmannedschneeblysrosievevoptrLaurenRoeej_ohn89traycule
  • dril
      wint @dril

    donald trump has no time to fuck. he looks at his watch and says "i could not possibly fuck at this juncture." as he powerwalks into the zoo

    • 3,573
    • FAVS
    mj_cIarkdaddy_sanWifeOfGodzillaTboneMurphmicky864anotedbarddoguacateQueerDiscOx
    • 1,396
    • RETWEETS
    VarnyhamTboneMurphhrtbpsSynthJonah391455dansumptionflabberdacksteethfallingout
    DUSTINAM
  • dril
      wint @dril

    a "keg" is teenspeak for a large barrel of the vile drug known as "Beer". they can be as tall as 12 ft and are often used to crush policemen

    • 3,121
    • FAVS
    neonblackfutureskylescrapermj_cIarkkevbaby325gracefulflailMichaeluhhjakeinsidekrelbel
    • 1,801
    • RETWEETS
    LeanSalesmanScudDaHistoriankyleamartinmallgrungeAntDiPalmaweebabyshamusTheEasterNiggaThis_IsAustin
  • dril
      wint @dril

    my favorite part of nascar is when I vomit all over my shirt and car after the race., desecrating the logos of the brands that enslave me

    • 3,497
    • FAVS
    neonblackfutureding_postYaboingryannoyedMegAlexander19JeremyTylerGirlrascalcamdubya13
    • 1,350
    • RETWEETS
    LeanSalesmankyleamartintheboatsofusFengxiipanicattacking_zzapKeithFavrevery_abstract
  • dril
      wint @dril

    caught my son running a google search for " shit stain pussy ". i am beyond distraught. we are strictly a Bing family

    • 3,171
    • FAVS
    krelbeldpatrickgMarc_NormandinJeremyTylerGhamskiipanicattacking_RickshawCrawUntrails
    • 1,505
    • RETWEETS
    sus_as_hellTheBabyJaysusspiral_scratchfrat_father_freshwasabiMackerelSodaJ_CullensNamelessRanger
    partiallyproKosmatos
  • dril
      wint @dril

    THE COP GROWLS "TAKE OFF TH OSE JEANS, CITIZEN." I COMPLY, REVEALING THE FULL LENGTH DENIM TATTOOS ON BOTH LEGS. THE COP SCREAMS; DEFEATED

    • 2,826
    • FAVS
    jozsereyesJeremyTylerGpanicattacking_lifeisadonutmindtrapforeverZeppoWilburyTraneWreck4meeple_
    • 1,848
    • RETWEETS
    LeanSalesmanJeremyTylerGlifeisadonutsurf_goth69AlecButModarn__ZeppoWilburyt_crayfordpowerfulshampoo
    NeutronDreDankHerbMulletslimepukeMrPapaya__________danieleastman
@dril

@dril

rat with human face given medal by world health organization