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  • dril
      wint @dril

    if your grave doesnt say "rest in peace" on it you are automatically drafted into the skeleton war

    • 8,057
    • FAVS
    andrewcamerathe_em_dashoverallverdictdandouglasDillDoyleofficejokesterpatjburnsgraysongraysonk
    • 7,067
    • RETWEETS
    plainskullJakeVan_Gendu_CubiekartLukeBryanSucksDillDoyleVaaderrrdesplesda
    FuckTypingAmSockoctoqtshruglorddavedittell
  • dril
      wint @dril

    Food $200
    Data $150
    Rent $800
    Candles $3,600
    Utility $150
    someone who is good at the economy please help me budget this. my family is dying

    • 4,896
    • FAVS
    BastardySkullZacB__FinkyC93DudeInABearSuitalexandrabowlsgtpd75Dipxsssdropkickpikachu
    • 3,225
    • RETWEETS
    maxgeorgiesTom_J_AllenBastardySkullelectrasmarilynbaby__turtlesVerdaIingErectionMeds4UZacB__
    vapelord69
  • dril
      wint @dril

    big bird was obviously just a man in a suit. but the other ones were too small to contain men. so what the fuck

    • 5,039
    • FAVS
    femmepizzaludacrispsbrentbizzmo22alhertaniSamuelLessingandrewcameraStephenBowles1an_ianpaul
    • 2,890
    • RETWEETS
    hannahisfabbludacrispsbrentbizzvassilyevvfuckmountainsplainskullcodyhokansMattsBestTweets
    DickPicSender
  • dril
      wint @dril

    the doctor reveals my blood pressure is 420 over 69. i hoot & holler outta the building while a bunch of losers try to tell me that im dying

    • 4,060
    • FAVS
    pkr0ckinrycalawreandrewcameratomkaroletomathummertrvrplkDeeeeevidMcCraesaudadesocial
    • 2,797
    • RETWEETS
    pkr0ckinMrDrMillerVaaderrrsmograthDeeeeevidMcCraeKillerkerfuffleChalupacabra__MadeleineRamb
    octoqtmojo_ca
  • dril
      wint @dril

    fuck "jokes". everything i tweet is real. raw insight without the horse shit. no, i will NOT follow trolls. twitter dot com. i live for this

    • 3,894
    • FAVS
    Barty_intheUSASPianovichalandudaandrewcameraDillin523tomkaroletomathummerparallelcircle
    • 2,522
    • RETWEETS
    YoshokatanaBarty_intheUSAplainskullbucketofbrainsCubiekarttomkaroleparallelcircleinrnt
    lanyardiganJermHimselfishCoolBabyRatoctoqtSimon_BarrettpissGoblinAceMakesWordslosdrogasHermit_Thrushi_have_4_dickslawblobfartLindzetadisaster_dogjitkavincenessrare_basementSlennon_
  • dril
      wint @dril

    BOSS TELLS ME I CAN KISS MY FERRETS AT WORK, BUT NO OPEN MOUTH. I PUNCH THE FLOOR SO HARD HIS SCREEN SAVER DEACTIVATES

    • 4,085
    • FAVS
    Wilshidecoolhands_lukeTurdieBagFartandrewcameraevasive_whaleElleOhHellaehiilrsnaughtysneaky
    • 2,272
    • RETWEETS
    coolhands_lukeplainskulltttrrriiissttanErectionMeds4Uandrewcameraslakes_Cubiekartnaughtysneaky
    ActingAnEejitEvaGisellebriangaarneatdeerGHOSTBONESrobfeefartslimepuke
  • dril
      wint @dril

    another day volunteering at the betsy ross museum. everyone keeps asking me if they can fuck the flag. buddy, they wont even let me fuck it

    • 3,991
    • FAVS
    namethebatstheycallmejwowjmagilhiitsmollyjacksonshroutsomecleverthingskepanieandrewcamera
    • 1,801
    • RETWEETS
    femmepizzaplainskullsomecleverthingbingtoolbarCubiekarttwelverpeeberIipstickstainedNeurotrap
    z_a_c_h_k_a_t_zironisktvitBeverlyCleary69lawblobshruglordAmSockactualjellyfishGarbageMysticgubbinsgubbins____
  • dril
      wint @dril

    The reason the "Cars" movies have gained so much popularity is becuase the cars speak to one another. You don't get that with real life cars

    • 3,361
    • FAVS
    femmepizzaMykonosFanSAgimmedatpretzelSamuelLessingRyanTrimble23codyhokansgoutmedsweavesdropper
    • 2,302
    • RETWEETS
    femmepizzamatt_thorpebabyskeletonNet_BastardMykonosFanSANeilFantastic1plainskull_Gendu_
    DavidRaymondT
  • dril
      wint @dril

    two men emerge from sensory deprivation tanks
    "I just attained oneness with all living beings"
    "I just fucked the Girl rabbit from SpaceJam"

    • 3,422
    • FAVS
    fuqb0iADumbFlowersmemes4yaboigiantsandlesDukeRaccoontheycallmejwowEenfidelmlmmlmmlm
    • 1,582
    • RETWEETS
    giantsandlesbongzingamilkin_hunniessomecleverthinggimmedatpretzelErectionMeds4UTotallyAnalogabalols
    AmSock
  • dril
      wint @dril

    "Is Wario A Libertarian" - the greatest thread in the history of forums, locked by a moderator after 12,239 pages of heated debate,

    • 2,813
    • FAVS
    jmagilmoderndaybcAstro_HansoevankirbyThynebearandrewcameratomathummersadbutradpoet
    • 2,044
    • RETWEETS
    jmagilmoderndaybcstepchapplainskullslakes_sadbutradpoetDJAnemicToadLilCorgi
    hotsoccerchic69SweetTweetsBROpjlynchshruglordactualjellyfishWeedCoffin
  • dril
      wint @dril

    AS THE GUILLOTINE SLIDES TOWARDS MY NECK, I PRODUCE A TINY BARBELL I'VE BEEN HIDING IN MY MOUTH AND LIFT IT WITH MY TONGUE. ONE LAST REP

    • 3,124
    • FAVS
    meriiscoolbotothyandrewcameratomathummerJDPeeryblearyboyJustinLalorsaudadesocial
    • 1,645
    • RETWEETS
    Toshvahmeriiscoolbotothyslakes_CubiekartJDPeeryRoderickA1jaxlrose
    buttcafe
  • dril
      wint @dril

    caught my son running a google search for " shit stain pussy ". i am beyond distraught. we are strictly a Bing family

    • 3,128
    • FAVS
    jmagiltomathummerblearyboyPollutikornsaudadesocialnasboatxxJeelShamexxevasive_whale
    • 1,490
    • RETWEETS
    plainskullErectionMeds4URachelvsPublicNeurotrapGhostofBebopboanusnasboatbriancurran29
    partiallyproKosmatos
  • dril
      wint @dril

    THE COP GROWLS "TAKE OFF TH OSE JEANS, CITIZEN." I COMPLY, REVEALING THE FULL LENGTH DENIM TATTOOS ON BOTH LEGS. THE COP SCREAMS; DEFEATED

    • 2,702
    • FAVS
    marialeervsGOOGY_GOBERHugh_JaynasimkoenigforyouBoltCranklerSagTheBobetEbbyGailltomathummer
    • 1,768
    • RETWEETS
    ErectionMeds4UmarialeervsGOOGY_GOBERHugh_JaynasSagTheBobetdunndunndunnweightofthesunDickFurari
    NeutronReDankHerbMulletslimepukeMrPapaya__________danieleastman
  • dril
      wint @dril

    "This Whole Thing Smacks Of Gender," i holler as i overturn my uncle's barbeque grill and turn the 4th of July into the 4th of Shit

    • 2,516
    • FAVS
    SteeScribblesmatthiasellisplentyofalcovesCATBOXMANBamezJondPollutikornAustinCHowelyricallilting
    • 1,601
    • RETWEETS
    CATBOXMANNet_BastardAerox47warmandpunchysicilianjulySpinandSaydetectiverolefrushi
    octoqtloveletterbombs
  • dril
      wint @dril

    how dare you fuck with me. how dare you fuck with me , on the year of Luigi

    • 2,289
    • FAVS
    tomathummersaudadesocialPYRAMIDLIFE420for_geonwhiteboyparadoxzurilianwtp09crysissandgoon
    • 1,738
    • RETWEETS
    NeurotrapckolderupnasboatTeen_SlimecorecatebulbturdfailureduyarvishOvermayor
    WeedCoffin
  • dril
      wint @dril

    "FEAR IS USED 2 ENSLAVE THE MASSES," I SAID AS I RIPPED THE FUCKIN DECORATIVE CARDBOARD SKELETON OFF OF THE COMMUNITY CENTERS BULLETIN BOARD

    • 2,241
    • FAVS
    the_em_dashtomathummeryungturdmeowitskathleenbuttjamssaudadesocial_CursedTeaPeteMauroIII
    • 1,574
    • RETWEETS
    plainskullCubiekartthe_em_dashNeurotrapanamericangodsmograthreturntovendorMikeGarba
    CurryShoffSimon_Barrettgreenteam15BadNewsCentral
  • dril
      wint @dril

    icant come to work today.. on account of JERRY DUTY *SHoves every seinfeld disk into dvd player at once*

    • 2,264
    • FAVS
    jmagiltomathummerClareLuncefordmorbidtouristcalhendrixswampdaughtersanta_cuntLetsBeSapid
    • 1,536
    • RETWEETS
    plainskullCubiekartswampdaughterLetsBeSapidimmortalfireboymemes4yaboiLeonardCowalskichickenscrap_
    losdrogaslawblobactualjellyfishoctoqtme_irl
  • dril
      wint @dril

    obama and his crack team of nsa crooks watching me shit: "sir, he's scooting backwards so his dick doesn't touch the rim" "Thuis guy's good"

    • 2,577
    • FAVS
    jmagiltomathummerBakahentai69woopertamperplateaugrantmundaysaudadesocialchrisfaenza
    • 1,091
    • RETWEETS
    limewizardjmagilplainskullErectionMeds4UNeurotrapwilrettceebelsBakahentai69
    NeutronReperceptionist
  • dril
      wint @dril

    its true. each cow's udder has one teat that will shoot piss instead of milk and ruin the whole batch. they call it the Farmer's Gamble

    • 2,588
    • FAVS
    RobertMFalconiterriblegardneradambacallbaspingoblearyboymfigurelliShimmersteakBlarebare
    • 1,052
    • RETWEETS
    plainskullArronskidoctor_assNeurotrapmfigurelliBlarebarelipid_bilayerhyperbollad
  • dril
      wint @dril

    just give me one hour and no swear filter and i can literally completely destroy anyone psychologically with aim instant messenge

    • 2,354
    • FAVS
    sweet_conortyranosexEricLeeeeeeeTrainfireirlrascalcassadnraK_______dchizimp
    • 1,206
    • RETWEETS
    dumblelordDankDevicefr_nchfriesbaby__turtlesAG_313wavegraveIamnotacoppeacoatseason
@dril

@dril

rat with human face given medal by world health organization