Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
if your grave doesnt say "rest in peace" on it you are automatically drafted into the skeleton war
someone who is good at the economy please help me budget this. my family is dying
big bird was obviously just a man in a suit. but the other ones were too small to contain men. so what the fuck
the doctor reveals my blood pressure is 420 over 69. i hoot & holler outta the building while a bunch of losers try to tell me that im dying
fuck "jokes". everything i tweet is real. raw insight without the horse shit. no, i will NOT follow trolls. twitter dot com. i live for this
BOSS TELLS ME I CAN KISS MY FERRETS AT WORK, BUT NO OPEN MOUTH. I PUNCH THE FLOOR SO HARD HIS SCREEN SAVER DEACTIVATES
another day volunteering at the betsy ross museum. everyone keeps asking me if they can fuck the flag. buddy, they wont even let me fuck it
The reason the "Cars" movies have gained so much popularity is becuase the cars speak to one another. You don't get that with real life cars
two men emerge from sensory deprivation tanks
"I just attained oneness with all living beings"
"I just fucked the Girl rabbit from SpaceJam"
"Is Wario A Libertarian" - the greatest thread in the history of forums, locked by a moderator after 12,239 pages of heated debate,
AS THE GUILLOTINE SLIDES TOWARDS MY NECK, I PRODUCE A TINY BARBELL I'VE BEEN HIDING IN MY MOUTH AND LIFT IT WITH MY TONGUE. ONE LAST REP
caught my son running a google search for " shit stain pussy ". i am beyond distraught. we are strictly a Bing family
THE COP GROWLS "TAKE OFF TH OSE JEANS, CITIZEN." I COMPLY, REVEALING THE FULL LENGTH DENIM TATTOOS ON BOTH LEGS. THE COP SCREAMS; DEFEATED
"This Whole Thing Smacks Of Gender," i holler as i overturn my uncle's barbeque grill and turn the 4th of July into the 4th of Shit
how dare you fuck with me. how dare you fuck with me , on the year of Luigi
"FEAR IS USED 2 ENSLAVE THE MASSES," I SAID AS I RIPPED THE FUCKIN DECORATIVE CARDBOARD SKELETON OFF OF THE COMMUNITY CENTERS BULLETIN BOARD
icant come to work today.. on account of JERRY DUTY *SHoves every seinfeld disk into dvd player at once*
obama and his crack team of nsa crooks watching me shit: "sir, he's scooting backwards so his dick doesn't touch the rim" "Thuis guy's good"
its true. each cow's udder has one teat that will shoot piss instead of milk and ruin the whole batch. they call it the Farmer's Gamble
*understands tthe full potential of the net all at once and stumbles backward wwhile struggling to breathe* christ,. my god