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  • dril
      wint @dril

    another day volunteering at the betsy ross museum. everyone keeps asking me if they can fuck the flag. buddy, they wont even let me fuck it

    • 5,793
    • FAVS
    skoll89FORGETTHATNOISEchristinawilderMattMcGruffgenuinely_sorryDBwiddaDBTalbertrossTonyD069
    • 2,760
    • RETWEETS
    MattMcGruffTysonBoydaloser_shawtyDomniczykranndrewkeeganttsUnhingedBlahscornedwoman
    kDuncanGz_a_c_h_k_a_t_zironisktvitBeverlyCleary69lawblobshruglordAmSockactualjellyfishGarbageMystic__gubbinsgubbins____
  • dril
      wint @dril

    koko the talking ape.. has been living high on the hog, wasting our tax dollars on high capacity diapers. No more. i will suplex that beast,

    • 2,288
    • FAVS
    Westerness604rycalawrescottruconichdrchriswolfmanpetfurnituret_hillzfanfiction_txtmad0m
    • 955
    • RETWEETS
    AntDiPalmascottruconichbraketdeadHEDRONsodopesofreshdadholesBillyLasVegascooldamnschultz
    LHGarrett
  • dril
      wint @dril

    "Is Wario A Libertarian" - the greatest thread in the history of forums, locked by a moderator after 12,239 pages of heated debate,

    • 3,644
    • FAVS
    TheBurger_PressdrewjandamlwryColinAFlowersSunshineJarbolyEricCunningham_johnmaxwell2HOLT2HANDLE
    • 2,570
    • RETWEETS
    TheBurger_PressKonekoSenseiJDelVigetdownerjake_radsam_reginaldJohnPaulMDgoldbluhm
    BromanConsulgoodasspostsSweetTweetsBROpjlynchshruglordactualjellyfishWeedCoffin
  • dril
      wint @dril

    big bird was obviously just a man in a suit. but the other ones were too small to contain men. so what the fuck

    • 6,921
    • FAVS
    skoll89drewjandaNozomemeQueensharpalrighttobykeithsweatbased_bitch420_domtwurkpeegrits
    • 4,217
    • RETWEETS
    shit_its_sarahAbeBromanTheBurger_PressTheAmitieWURTZt_tweetzdomtwurkpeegritsbr0wnmagic69
    TheTweetParrotyeahsometimesJermHimselfishDickPicSender
  • dril
      wint @dril

    "This Whole Thing Smacks Of Gender," i holler as i overturn my uncle's barbeque grill and turn the 4th of July into the 4th of Shit

    • 3,872
    • FAVS
    daze_gazeseirin08jasminedreameKeegzzJohnASinclairSlewFootersguest_star_alexbradcesanek
    • 2,744
    • RETWEETS
    GloverTroyseirin08retyartmitch_hav_BerlinWalruspatchak21SweetPatootthe_gaming_king
    earfdaeoctoqtloveletterbombs
  • dril
      wint @dril

    donald trump has no time to fuck. he looks at his watch and says "i could not possibly fuck at this juncture." as he powerwalks into the zoo

    • 3,738
    • FAVS
    coreygarryJohnASinclairfuuuuuuucZettaToadBrewbirdscool_bugscushbombaklingus
    • 1,483
    • RETWEETS
    MonsMegHeaddavefranklinDavement_joelgolbywaynesmith1971WH1MSYAlexDJonesjohnwarrender
    DUSTINAM
  • dril
      wint @dril

    who the fuck is scraeming "LOG OFF" at my house. show yourself, coward. i will never log off

    • 2,660
    • FAVS
    botazlabestiawaltlillyhollowNaimBword_hardHvictorecabarrenJohnASinclairchrismets_camwba
    • 1,506
    • RETWEETS
    thanksdeertrynnagetajobhollowNaimvictorecabarrentwistofnateConorWalshy_camwbaMattyBattyy
    lesterfreamonHermit_Thrush
  • dril
      wint @dril

    my priceless stradivarius gaming keyboard... fcovered in policeman urine

    • 725
    • FAVS
    michael_carter2ASAPBullwinkleboanusrogerclarkcool_nobodyrpbtheiv20000TinyJarsMarcus_ODea
    • 234
    • RETWEETS
    CoreganPixelGuffwooperVN_RubenjoeftakravatalvStevieBvikissdads
    Mike_Bianchi
  • dril
      wint @dril

    the doctor reveals my blood pressure is 420 over 69. i hoot & holler outta the building while a bunch of losers try to tell me that im dying

    • 4,800
    • FAVS
    skoll89alexualhealingjdcrowleyDoctor_FieldDrBlueJeannsfredr1khfoursquidsChicoDeLechuga
    • 3,325
    • RETWEETS
    vector_crimesDoubleEntAndrewJakesterrBarroldBondsmelbleimznonowrightbugginalyssabethpayne12
    R_Schmittyoctoqtmojo_ca
  • dril
      wint @dril

    fuck "jokes". everything i tweet is real. raw insight without the horse shit. no, i will NOT follow trolls. twitter dot com. i live for this

    • 4,850
    • FAVS
    NozomemeQueengenuinely_sorryJamesNormingtonapopagasmjuneaurosetakeoSaraCiviantwistofnate
    • 3,046
    • RETWEETS
    PizzaSam31bonesruboJoeriSmitGnarettTheGreatGoogverycozywilrettKimJongSean
    lesterfreamonsunfilterlanyardiganJermHimselfishCoolBabyRatoctoqtSimon_BarrettpissGoblinAceMakesWordslosdrogasHermit_Thrushi_have_4_dickslawblobfartLindzetadisaster_dogjitkavincenessrare_basementSlennon_
  • dril
      wint @dril

    BOSS TELLS ME I CAN KISS MY FERRETS AT WORK, BUT NO OPEN MOUTH. I PUNCH THE FLOOR SO HARD HIS SCREEN SAVER DEACTIVATES

    • 4,649
    • FAVS
    mlwrycoreygarryevidentlyblondeNoble_Avenuejoshoutloudpaucity__HommusapienDirtyHalt
    • 2,590
    • RETWEETS
    Noble_Avenuejoshoutloudpaucity__HommusapienprakticenalpistolwistolBobbyGrizWhere__wolf
    DamnItsTrillUpturnedBathtubEvaGisellebriangaarneatdeerGHOSTBONESrobfeefartslimepuke__
  • dril
      wint @dril

    Food $200
    Data $150
    Rent $800
    Candles $3,600
    Utility $150
    someone who is good at the economy please help me budget this. my family is dying

    • 7,162
    • FAVS
    skoll89TheBurger_PressMGakemlwrylessthankyleshowerbearBloatedCarcassscreambucket
    • 4,744
    • RETWEETS
    NotTomGarbutttomfahy1lostinvioletDavement_lessthankyleCWestinghamhomeschooldanmattyeightfour
    vapelord69
  • dril
      wint @dril

    its the weekend baby. youknow what that means. its time to drink precisely one beer and call 911

    • 1,852
    • FAVS
    brushmanecoreygarryJohnASinclairChoplogikInternetskull92Jenny_Loughmanarjan____michael_carter2
    • 1,096
    • RETWEETS
    brushmanechukwukamsoarjan____capitaljizzmlookinmookerinofthestatemichaeljbgOccamsblazer420
    z_a_c_h_k_a_t_zsunfilter
  • dril
      wint @dril

    THE COP GROWLS "TAKE OFF TH OSE JEANS, CITIZEN." I COMPLY, REVEALING THE FULL LENGTH DENIM TATTOOS ON BOTH LEGS. THE COP SCREAMS; DEFEATED

    • 3,111
    • FAVS
    notyrsweetheartSo_OccultJenny_LoughmanIceCubeCirca92kvntellisAntsInWAyoushotmarvinsexualjumanji
    • 1,976
    • RETWEETS
    PappyShannonRyfaceDeusExJuiceSo_OccultheckajakesexualjumanjilookinmookMikeBeas
    NeutronDreDankHerbMulletslimepuke__MrPapaya__________danieleastman
  • dril
      wint @dril

    obama and his crack team of nsa crooks watching me shit: "sir, he's scooting backwards so his dick doesn't touch the rim" "Thuis guy's good"

    • 2,847
    • FAVS
    lucidglitchsolar_rexusAndoandoDezBallvintzantyaynarcissismMcCueCuegarthinkingcap
    • 1,210
    • RETWEETS
    killerskinkScubaSteve1219jpMRPHWright_ThoughtsHelloGallogiantsandlesshit_its_sarahyungsweater
    NeutronDreperceptionist
  • dril
      wint @dril

    ive got my eye on you matrix_gary.

    • 228
    • FAVS
    riceysanTheVictasticKagentkonybanksDanCoolMoonGuyDK_AD_WartSnackmaximumcuddlesteenirl
    • 33
    • RETWEETS
    vinceperritanoobamacare69jahonkus__________SailorTweakpimetaradoGinGanderTheFunkodileDylanNelkin
    ChipotIe
  • dril
      wint @dril

    two men emerge from sensory deprivation tanks
    "I just attained oneness with all living beings"
    "I just fucked the Girl rabbit from SpaceJam"

    • 3,638
    • FAVS
    sbenthallonehalfhuman_FuckTypingdj_mosfettTheAmitietobykeithsweatxPizzaxSlutxsadolan
    • 1,677
    • RETWEETS
    Theon_Matthewsonehalfhuman_tobykeithsweatxPizzaxSlutxDovidSchlittsoapbythebarirrevilentbalsamicvinager
    AmSock
  • dril
      wint @dril

    i approve of congres... i believe they are doing a very good job despite negative comments online

    • 680
    • FAVS
    BadNewsCentralBenghaziExpertjlb250Brian_HennessySam_KeadyDanCoolMoonGuyDK_AD_drchriswolfman
    • 190
    • RETWEETS
    BenghaziExpertDanCoolMoonGuydavid_bairdweed_mouseYOLOSWAGATTACKSNickrobJohnGregoryJrlukejcole
    drewgrimaldi
  • dril
      wint @dril

    my next good post is about egg salad. What in the shit?? are you egg or salad? Why is this good. Who's eating it. Check Please. uhhh

    • 605
    • FAVS
    apopagasmTheVictasticKjakeinsidesomecleverthingalvybarishelishashagrantyOfollowdavehome
    • 204
    • RETWEETS
    somecleverthingconomolanfollowdavehomebipermanextremeprismbotothyBakahentai69murdvert
    ChipotIe
@dril

@dril

rat with human face given medal by world health organization

Tweets from @dril most recently awarded Tweet of the Day by Pro Members.