@dropdeadchris' (Chris Holifield) most faved Tweets...
2 years ago today I quit smoking. If I wouldn't have quit I would have smoked about 22,000 cigarettes. This tweet better get that many stars
Just curious if anyone has looked into the laws of marrying an electric blanket. I am in Utah if this changes anything.
I don't think I was the only male doing the walk o' shame out of the theater tonight after New Moon.
I'm enjoying my relaxing Sunday listening to my upstairs neighbors TV through the ceiling. When I pictured free cable, this wasn't it.
do you think the creator of Snuggie is laughing his ass off as he convinced a nation of people that its ok to just wear the robe backwards?
Was told that I looked a lil' like Jesus. Maybe its my beard,but I got to thinking it was probably from the ketchup I had all over my palms.
has anyone ever gotten any of these little peanut M&M's to talk to them while not on any psychedelic hallucinogens? yeah I didn't think so..
Whenever I overcook hot pockets and they become too stiff to eat I swear I hear a series of sad trombones playing quietly just for me.
pez dispensers that dispense little pieces of bacon... someone needs to get on this cause i would likey
Sometimes I miss that screeching sound computers made when connecting to the internet years ago. Please tell me im not the only one.
worst thing about smelling farts at thrift store is that you dont know if its the person you are standing by or clothing you are looking at
Since all my neighbors speak Spanish & don't understand English, sometimes I pretend I am living in another country & im all exotic & shit.
sometimes I wish I carried stars in my pocket to hand out to people in real life, I feel like a greedy person only sharing them on twitter.
I must be really tired because I swear the moth that just landed on my shoulder whispered something in spanish and flew away #fb
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