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Reese Witherspoon grips the bars of her jail cell while staring at a cop. "May your crops suffer," she whispers
RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: Spinach quiche.
What bees? What are you talking about?
The new young, sexy pope will send out emails before becoming pope. Subject: "HEY TEAM!" . He will def CC old, advanced age pope
What we experienced together at Sherwin-Williams was real. I don't eat paint with just anyone, you know
Um I literally live, eat, and breathe fashion xoxoxo
"We want to make sure you think about fading youth and your own mortality while you try to go to sleep!"-Distant train horns at night
I text ppl who've wronged me at inappropriate hours "This song makes me think of you" & send a video of me making whale noises in the woods
MAILER-DAEMON AS METAPHOR FOR GOD
About to rake leaves for my parents. I guess I can find some time to wave the rake in the air and yell "I have theories" at their neighbors
Taylor Swift mouths "My husband's a senator" into mirror, giggles. She looks out the window at the glowing dusk. 'I feel nothing' she thinks
Walked to the edge of the subway platform and crossed my arms. Haven't felt this butch since my days at the leather tannery
Vinny read the text Pauly D. sent him: "On beach now-I'll wait a little longer". He hesitated at the sliding door; it would be dawn soon
My dad went to the store to buy cigarettes then came home and accomplished some cool things and we have a pretty good relationship
I'm fascinated by this Lively/Reynolds marriage. It's like one day they decided "We're the most beautiful 'Eh's to ever live. Let's do it!"
"Your tree fort looks like shit"-Kathleen Turner to a kid at a neighborhood BBQ
There was so much pressure in my kindergarten class to lose the lbs before our body tracing project
Look, if you're going to insult my kimono, you didn't have to come to my seance in the first place
I hope I'm never "walk barefoot into a gas station convenience store" comfortable with myself
I scream through 100% of the left turns I make
Could I pull off a beanie? I'm already kind of awful
Very active in PTA. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WyA7QAprCP8 1/2 of @NotTildaSwinton