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120 million spent by my government to convict Roger Clemens. Who was acquitted of all charges. I would like a refund, please.
The GOP is attempting to #occupy my womb.
I'm taking a trip to wine country, too. If by "wine country" you mean "the second shelf in my refrigerator."
I want cake like a fat kid wants...well, cake.
Just reminding you the Puppy Bowl went off without a hitch today, people.
Everyone sing along...
Carpool. Anyone interested in some slightly used white kids?
Catch 47% #Mitterature
Send tweets to Facebook indeed. Where do you think I hide from my Facebook friends?
You'd think instead of trying to boycott that Florida restaurant owner, the Republicans would be hugging him too. Way to win friends.
Good god, that Tulane player broke his neck. Tracheotomy ON THE FIELD. PRAYERS.
Four years ago I didn't need glasses. I BLAME OBAMA.
Decaf coffee and non-alcoholic beer must be for people who just like to pee more.
Licensed Professional, raconteuse, mother of three, blue chick in the reddest state: hilarity ensues. Opinions on popular culture as a free public service.