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  • evofck
      Evan @evofck

    Gift @evofck Favstar Pro to unlock their best tweet!Gift them Pro!

    • 822
    • LIKES
    life_suckerBlackJermsjrza84NawtyMynxbeatendownhubsSadPerunapeahairB0nrMunky
    • 430
    • RETWEETS
    ohshitmybad_BlackJermsNawtyMynxbeatendownhubsr_wolfcastleSammmySam_93toujours_fabsomeonelikesmeg
    VivalazosoBlack__Elvis
  • evofck
      Evan @evofck

    I wish I was full of tacos instead of feelings

    • 624
    • LIKES
    CornerPubRonxLiserxkayleighpugetAnon_imosityryan_rachryan80itisLauren_AMickelicMixailovich
    • 516
    • RETWEETS
    xLiserxAnon_imosityryan_rachryan80iLikeCatShirtsjunejuly12Dunking_Oreoskaatilanacharmfoz
    TDeeRockgokananas
  • evofck
      Evan @evofck

    My roommate wouldn't let me name our wireless network 'Bill Wi the Science Fi' because he has no sense of humor.

    • 734
    • LIKES
    CornerPubRonImTheSheriffCallMeDraperHudallabillxLiserxAnon_imosityEmily5656silvertongue37
    • 382
    • RETWEETS
    ImTheSheriffCallMeDraperA_gligsxLiserxEmily5656acwarbsdarkmatter_wimpcharliedelta7
    LizWhatsherfacecazzawndruh__fUCK_iSAAC___
  • evofck
      Evan @evofck

    In toy story 3, Andy is 17...that means for many years the toys sat in silence and watched as he furiously masturbated.

    • 598
    • LIKES
    CornerPubRonSophie2078IzianikapanikayleighpugetAnon_imosityNahdude83BombayNookcharliedelta7
    • 370
    • RETWEETS
    Anon_imosityNahdude83charliedelta7k38mackKoreGoddessharbitcrystal79ladyignobleTheAlexNevil
    fUCK_iSAAC___
  • evofck
      Evan @evofck

    Tried to kill a spider with hair spray. It's still alive, but it's hair looks FABULOOOOOUS!

    • 454
    • LIKES
    CornerPubRonxLiserxSophie2078IzianikapanikayleighpugetAnon_imosityNahdude83charliedelta7
    • 208
    • RETWEETS
    Anon_imosityNahdude83iLikeCatShirtsjunejuly12charliedelta7necrosocksxofrecklesUhhmIDontKnow__
  • evofck
      Evan @evofck

    It's cute how we all eat popcorn like we haven't seen or eaten food in 5 years.

    • 403
    • LIKES
    CornerPubRonblisshedxLiserxkayleighpugetIzianikapaniAnon_imositycharliedelta7TheAlexNevil
    • 224
    • RETWEETS
    xLiserxAnon_imositycharliedelta7UhhmIDontKnow__DominicStrawRideSallyRide69dirtydishtowelsTheeErin
  • evofck
      Evan @evofck

    Damn girl, are you a Terms and Conditions document because I don't give a fuck what you say.

    • 347
    • LIKES
    CornerPubRonxLiserxviolet_heartinthepoetknight__Sophie2078kayleighpugetAnon_imosityryan_rachryan80
    • 185
    • RETWEETS
    thepoetknight__Anon_imosityryan_rachryan80charliedelta7BritXNicUhhmIDontKnow__DominicStrawRideSallyRide69
    ImJESSPlayinjakegunstCourtniss_
  • evofck
      Evan @evofck

    I have so much anger and hate in me right now, I almost feel like a Christian

    • 357
    • LIKES
    CornerPubRonAnon_imosityVendelaFjordthehotzipcharliedelta7CharlokarizTheAndreaAbbateWindahl
    • 154
    • RETWEETS
    charliedelta7AshleyHippslynetmitorasunny85139DanaCarlson18KrzysztofKaniaweldergirl1MrAlanCooper
    JediGigigarrettn
  • evofck
      Evan @evofck

    Reasons why you should date me:
    1)
    2)
    3)
    4)
    5) Please.

    • 321
    • LIKES
    CornerPubRonSadPerunamjs2430someonelikesmegxLiserxnoxxhellBripping_TallsNerdinessBound
    • 182
    • RETWEETS
    someonelikesmegnoxxhellInferno_Vviolet_heartinAnon_imosityKristinStiff1mindythewindystevelinck
  • evofck
      Evan @evofck

    Vending Machines kill 13 people a year. Sharks kill 5.

    I can't wait until Homicidal Vending Machine week.

    • 313
    • LIKES
    CornerPubRonAnon_imosityWritingLyoniLikeCatShirtsxofrecklesNotMarkAllenchosen413UhhmIDontKnow__
    • 147
    • RETWEETS
    xofreckleschosen413UhhmIDontKnow__CharmandBrainsJ_Illunninatisemple42betty0674nikrsnbrgr__
    RandomlyMJ__
  • evofck
      Evan @evofck

    My mom told me that if I ever hit 1000 followers she'll tell me who my real dad is.

    • 282
    • LIKES
    CornerPubRonSammyJB121violet_heartinkayleighpugetAnon_imosityWritingLyonKomradeJAndrewR31
    • 117
    • RETWEETS
    violet_heartinsophienuuttallAnon_imosityNotMarkAllenUhhmIDontKnow__armyantstudiosZombie_Kitv2CGuac
  • evofck
      Evan @evofck

    Sext: I'll go halfsies on Plan B

    • 263
    • LIKES
    CornerPubRonAnon_imosityNotMarkAllenUhhmIDontKnow__LBergenheierlittlelady899__DominicStrawDestineyLynn
    • 118
    • RETWEETS
    UhhmIDontKnow__SavageAphroditeMind_fukk__darkdemons24__ginzyj1983__ellejizzerTrvlnRvrsdBluesrunawaycupcake
    TeflonPawn
  • evofck
      Evan @evofck

    I wonder if any midget couples have Tiny Dancer as their song.

    • 239
    • LIKES
    CornerPubRonSadPerunasomeonelikesmegBripping_TallssophienuuttallSophie2078kayleighpugetAnon_imosity
    • 113
    • RETWEETS
    someonelikesmegAnon_imosityschaboinkMiketyMikeDeepika_raj_31KelsHottingDarkPutschBwanaChris
    iLikeCatShirtsMrAdamBez__
  • evofck
      Evan @evofck

    Say the opposite of these words: 1. always 2. coming 3. from 4. take 5. me 6. down

    • 228
    • LIKES
    CornerPubRonxLiserxAnon_imosityWritingLyonTheAlexNevilNotMarkAllenUhhmIDontKnow__ZeroFilterDarz
    • 116
    • RETWEETS
    UhhmIDontKnow__RideSallyRide69Kitkat1Katjabba_jabba_jawChyldCorey814cm_rutvikiLikeCatShirts
    RobertManchild
  • evofck
      Evan @evofck

    If you take life too seriously I'm going to tickle you until you shit yourself.

    • 236
    • LIKES
    CornerPubRonBripping_TallskayleighpugetSophie2078Anon_imosityxofrecklesUhhmIDontKnow__Hearyehearyee
    • 101
    • RETWEETS
    nuh_fugaziAnon_imosityxofrecklesUhhmIDontKnow__notPAIGEktmcburrlittlelady899__ToddSilbert
    laurascaz
  • evofck
      Evan @evofck

    The great thing about sleeping alone is you can be whatever spoon you want to be.



    :-(

    • 205
    • LIKES
    CornerPubRonsomeonelikesmegxLiserxAnon_imosityWritingLyonABusFullOfNunzbeermanboobs__Nahdude83
    • 89
    • RETWEETS
    LindsPoguegoomaloonIamMarandaiLikeCatShirtserrdayhustlahUhhmIDontKnow__angelina_mxoxoTheTower51
  • evofck
      Evan @evofck

    Not douchey enough. TAKE IT AWAY! - Ed Hardy

    • 194
    • LIKES
    CornerPubRonAnon_imosityWritingLyonsonny2221UhhmIDontKnow__jabba_jabba_jawLorieGZnonchalantnacho
    • 75
    • RETWEETS
    sonny2221UhhmIDontKnow__jabba_jabba_jawsullenacidfavstar_historycassvinceDarzieDAMN__KieranJML
    TrueDouche
  • evofck
      Evan @evofck

    Twitter crushes are the best way to realize how stupid you really are.

    • 178
    • LIKES
    CornerPubRonsomeonelikesmegxLiserxAnon_imosityWritingLyonKilgore_StudgeLoveNLunchmeatilovechunkyboyz__
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    Kilgore_StudgetiReynardUhhmIDontKnow__rishirestoneMVGICDVBZ__DeniseWalker81ContwixtFarisBueller_
    Ilovelamp1979enigmaticmess__RobertThirstLisa_Laughs_
  • evofck
      Evan @evofck

    I thought I saw Drake today but it was just a kitten playing with a paper bag

    • 172
    • LIKES
    CornerPubRonBripping_TallskayleighpugetSophie2078Anon_imosityxofrecklesKilgore_StudgeCreepowoman
    • 92
    • RETWEETS
    Anon_imosityKilgore_StudgeAllisonWendyhedgewitchlingblurryfacegonerLosLos__UhhmIDontKnow__JaBa_LBC
    tryped__
  • evofck
      Evan @evofck

    Got bit by a bug yesterday. Still an ordinary human being. FUCK THIS.

    • 192
    • LIKES
    CornerPubRonsomeonelikesmegAnon_imosityWritingLyonxofrecklestiReynardBadGalRicciinepedraza
    • 72
    • RETWEETS
    tiReynardUhhmIDontKnow__DominicStrawDerekActualstardust1006AskAuntieEm1dirtydishtowelssykomom123
@evofck

@evofck

I'm single and ready to fall in love too quick and without you feeling the same

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