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  • famouscrab
      famous crab @famouscrab

    @xboxsupport i accidtnly shot a man in GTA are you able to see if he is ok? he was wearing a red shirt and i shot him with a rocket launcher

    • 5,618
    • FAVS
    Muscular_BabyR2Disch2merinawitzlizlentilthirstfavschommstartswizzinSPSSS
    • 5,719
    • RETWEETS
    JsSmRentongojarberadicaljocyNick_SkerrittMCGreertownGoBullsForever_mariemelissanwaldron4
    gojarbeDonnie_Fairburnjake_likes_naps_wangwegrumpysalmoninmynewskin
  • famouscrab
      famous crab @famouscrab

    "NO NO NO NO" - the guy who invented folding chairs watching a wrestling match

    • 6,757
    • FAVS
    AyahAlghanemsavannahkhhouryfinemadsToriDivine_AyekaittIsaacTrailAvantGarciamuminho_
    • 3,917
    • RETWEETS
    CarnahanJourneyCoolbear77RidingWolvesGangeJnrIamGeciKiBaThAkEnHugh_Jaynasgnar_whale
    PaperWashinmynewskinrobfeesmickable
  • famouscrab
      famous crab @famouscrab

    some babies are born premature but i was born very mature i just came out and i was like so what

    • 5,031
    • FAVS
    kimmyliedelPattyTortethirstfavradicaljocy_lizreyes_ehhnataliakaylaramdatkirstenjoy2427
    • 4,136
    • RETWEETS
    mattdasilvaradicaljocyme_forSpeedbadtweetmakerlowspiritedlrhmrsbusterposey5rachelllbrownnnSaigeBrowne
    Benesh_lil_aracuanlanyardiganjonnysunMaryKoCohottubpee
  • famouscrab
      famous crab @famouscrab

    fool me once thats enough of times for fooling me and i dont really enjoy it. Thanks

    • 3,056
    • FAVS
    CoolishCoolidgethirstfavfartsinshowererictbarDukeRaccoonhollieeatworld__the_lamestshanopovapop
    • 2,041
    • RETWEETS
    EbethOstreet_mah_usernamezwhalezHarKrunchdrochachofaustoiEmaSlemaJoshJDee
    loveletterbombsMaryKoCoradiomaru
  • famouscrab
      famous crab @famouscrab

    u know how sum people get amnesia well i got opposite amnesia i remember everything ask me what i ate this morning. breakfast next question

    • 2,983
    • FAVS
    thirstfavDauphinDesRuesgojarberachelohara1216OnTheShaneTrainmtsully11TrentThompson92erictbar
    • 2,000
    • RETWEETS
    rokosJsSmRentongojarbePatienceViolarachelohara1216TrentThompson92alexxa_raeeeAlenaChek
    _Jim_Fearmojo_caDankHerbMulletbn2bQVTDrThanatos
  • famouscrab
      famous crab @famouscrab

    what if in airbud they put the dog in and they didnt win that coach would feel stupid

    • 2,714
    • FAVS
    spookymaplesChadVisionmaliarusherSecretIngrdientBrieKLhagrid_thegiantPedocodKashaanToGo
    • 1,977
    • RETWEETS
    noajenkChadVisionmaliarushermparrish1995DNasty937mclovin909DeportPantherrosiestr94
    Drew4484chrisjoonior
  • famouscrab
      famous crab @famouscrab

    space is stuped if im wanted to go somewhere where i cant breathe i would just stand next to a girl

    • 2,641
    • FAVS
    PattyTortec_selbyradicaljocyDukeRaccoonMokramala99Ibn_Rayehshanopovapopabsbestos
    • 1,573
    • RETWEETS
    boklaradicaljocyKylec15renegadeDAqueefsandwhichfrickboycodytaylordoanutBlakeTReynolds
    neatdeerfontiagomojo_caKKAlThaniemirkr
  • famouscrab
      famous crab @famouscrab

    hi son like my backwards hat? how bout that gerfald he sure eat a lasagna that cant be good for her. anyways bye *rollerblades away*

    • 2,831
    • FAVS
    SageThornbrughDukeRaccoonshanopovapopnulljoshprodigisinkyrumnogginternetluke
    • 1,377
    • RETWEETS
    bloodhaiIESThaYungKisserDjPattieJprodigisIOwnAMethLabBenjyHimmellaricholascagefredpeacocks
    cryotunalazy_joe_goodpowerful__jake_likes_napsMaryKoCoingmarbirdmanactualjellyfishabigfatidiotsenderblock23BikiniBabeLover
  • famouscrab
      famous crab @famouscrab

    you gotta turn your phone off when you fly in case an old plane text you and your new plane get jealous

    • 2,495
    • FAVS
    thirstfavSPSSSradicaljocyNathanEvensonTurnuptrevdougsimplyKittenWrittenokayjulia
    • 1,709
    • RETWEETS
    _workbxtchradicaljocydougsimplyLeStoner_KittenWrittenSpankMeIm0tyTeejayRushfwanjau
    hottubpeeAceMakesWordslil_aracuanbn2brobdelaneylaineydiamond____
  • famouscrab
      famous crab @famouscrab

    "carlos did u put youre shoes on the right feets today" YES DAD LEFT AND RIGHT "on YOUr feet son?" ..DAD THIS IS THE WRONGEST I EVER GOT IT

    • 2,630
    • FAVS
    andrewleafmanSageThornbrughdreatheworstmatildathewitchthirstfavChoplogikSweetNAwfulthugisolation
    • 1,452
    • RETWEETS
    jsigjkylerselbyemvanloanfeministfataIeAveCrallcoolteen123badtweetmakeranniemooon
    crylenolmathsnailloafbro__________UsedTurtlejonnysunloveletterbombsactualjellyfishBreterbiesvxlk
  • famouscrab
      famous crab @famouscrab

    hey honey check out this powerpoint i made of my moodswings *flips open laptop so hard it smash into the wall* MAYBE LATER!!!

    • 1,985
    • FAVS
    combatoperatimothymrshanopovapopjimmy_townPiecezillamarblenightchapel3929mihailstamenov
    • 1,192
    • RETWEETS
    eos420gJordanKinmanchapel3929ddrwgVoidArgumentIOwnAMethLabdeathnautbsnc64
    KalarlisMaryKoCogreenteam15
  • famouscrab
      famous crab @famouscrab

    yeah i got a gym membership. its called life. watch me lift this big ass rock. now im gonna do 20 reps of pretending im a beautiful bird

    • 1,882
    • FAVS
    samsquamchesjessicaredman_rapgameDrCranemarksiddens__zwhaleznulljoshmadelinemsjasgren
    • 1,178
    • RETWEETS
    brotulaCelestial_Love_sadibee_8corabankertGreysenTheGreat__notmoceanstranger_callsMcTangle
    jake_likes_napssomeofmybestvinceness
  • famouscrab
      famous crab @famouscrab

    im not here to make friends! - me at the zoo telling a lie lol

    • 1,562
    • FAVS
    R2Disch2gojarberadicaljocyshanopovapopnulljoshkaffebehovfilatelinmediokrasara
    • 936
    • RETWEETS
    gojarberadicaljocythemackernJakobJarnhandthziegler1Johnson689908lenac__poisonwomb
    A_Jahhvasedgod
  • famouscrab
      famous crab @famouscrab

    forgot my ipod so im just beatboxing on the bus.driver is breakdancing in the aisle. bus is going crazy right now we havent moved in 2 hours

    • 1,634
    • FAVS
    CoolishCoolidgethirstfavsedge_holidayarenaofshrugsstrawberrybogspiggityspockJosDebesteSimonjenkin
    • 841
    • RETWEETS
    arenaofshrugsouwessJosDebestetrashmagenulljoshTalkSinMusicSuperIncreiblenompodi
    RowdySailboatMrHeliotrope
  • famouscrab
      famous crab @famouscrab

    if u get intimidatied by someone just think EVERY1 goes to bed at night and put a blanket over themself so they dont get to cold!!! Aw

    • 1,486
    • FAVS
    merinawitzlizlentilthirstfavgojarbescottyvsSageThornbrughverisimilarityerik_lancaster
    • 962
    • RETWEETS
    JsSmRentongojarbescottyvscombatoperaverisimilaritynulljoshsosorrybruhEmaSlema
    MaryKoCo
  • famouscrab
      famous crab @famouscrab

    when i was just born the doctor took me in his big strong arms and thats when i knew for sure i was gay as hell

    • 1,331
    • FAVS
    thirstfav__the_lamestnulljoshEmaSlemaboymilkshakeSheherpspicybitch69666mei
    • 628
    • RETWEETS
    okayiwillpostBlobWalterFedoraHippiedeadhead1991jmemrieEpidemic_redheadcreatureenbykid
    Hermit_Thrush
  • famouscrab
      famous crab @famouscrab

    fellas i like to sit on my hand so it goes numb then it feel like someone else is wiping my tears away

    • 1,176
    • FAVS
    messmec2424thirstfavshivpreetsinghmantekhiahPowlerBaretimothymrdearmaricaGiaInsane
    • 767
    • RETWEETS
    shivpreetsinghEcmoyPowlerBareGiaInsanegabventuretimeresiJWHugh_JaynasIamnotacop
    earfdae
  • famouscrab
      famous crab @famouscrab

    Warning: password is case sensitive. password i think ur case is cute dont woorry so much

    • 1,062
    • FAVS
    thirstfavnulljoshdani_whatdannysparkychristianbarbinDonnie_FairburnTylerWingeatalexisgmm
    • 816
    • RETWEETS
    J_OHHHHHsoltysjkrishna_vanCidCammisnow_vanshutupheavwhatsgluten______lasertron
    RedJakiBlueNoPattern
  • famouscrab
      famous crab @famouscrab

    dinners READY! *i stab a hole in bottom of cornflakes box, 5 kids crawl in like spiders jostling for floor cereal i dont even know 2 of them

    • 1,247
    • FAVS
    thirstfavSPSSSradicaljocyerik_lancasterrapgameDrCrane__the_lamestmarksiddens__nulljosh
    • 622
    • RETWEETS
    MercuryFalconradicaljocythziegler1HighbbydickedbrownnalxpConfusedAbigailyungpoundcake
    Lindzetaiandury007
  • famouscrab
      famous crab @famouscrab

    i want to be as cool as elvis his catch phrase was thank you very much. thats probably the coolest thing i ve ever heard

    • 1,283
    • FAVS
    spookymaplesntngpskatiee_sheppbuttburgerschristinawildermdjarandiaJojo_deweyRobertGBorden
    • 524
    • RETWEETS
    kaitlarsenRobertGBordenDracula_420polytravellersubzer0tundraejthesingercatpineapplequeenanhedonia
    MaryKoCocryotuna
@famouscrab

@famouscrab

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