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  • famouscrab
      famouscarb @famouscrab

    @xboxsupport i accidtnly shot a man in GTA are you able to see if he is ok? he was wearing a red shirt and i shot him with a rocket launcher

    • 5,555
    • FAVS
    EmiStangattiFlaminbeastjetfreshflowShiftlessRastustommy_turdsspotmanozarenaofshrugssssh_squirrel
    • 5,679
    • RETWEETS
    FelatioMartinChcurry182jonfischlersneakybisonDaftPunkandLoveSquallmuzzaducksdoingthingCowlonFullerton
    _wangwegrumpysalmoninmynewskin
  • famouscrab
      famouscarb @famouscrab

    some babies are born premature but i was born very mature i just came out and i was like so what

    • 5,015
    • FAVS
    BigFizzMandingoturdvolcanola_la_la_LOLINGoingHard_ingerItzaGEEthinglevii143thefiendishdrwuohholybutt
    • 4,129
    • RETWEETS
    notnotlukeCommanderFredchichonchoASAPBullwinkleItzaGEEthingsatchgodthefiendishdrwuAbeBroman
    badtweetinglil_aracuanlanyardiganjonnysunMaryKoCohottubpee
  • famouscrab
      famouscarb @famouscrab

    "NO NO NO NO" - the guy who invented folding chairs watching a wrestling match

    • 4,266
    • FAVS
    l_wagstaffekcccmaystrawburrsLetdownLizzieBianBuhdQcQbSonOfSam93brettgamble_
    • 2,488
    • RETWEETS
    LetdownLizzieTay_Prince26kurtesyrapsjoshuasomethingShaneyMontzyourworshipnessantorangenuke_twoski
    PaperWashinmynewskinrobfeesmickable
  • famouscrab
      famouscarb @famouscrab

    fool me once thats enough of times for fooling me and i dont really enjoy it. Thanks

    • 3,043
    • FAVS
    sandboxtoysmeempsLetdownLizzieemfinnnruizzoethomasrummellarm_restgsstoak
    • 2,037
    • RETWEETS
    RyanBermudezchichonchogenrebegoodeMyles_Lobdellmcgee_gorgo2house2flynahxahnsuper_triangle
    loveletterbombsMaryKoCoradiomaru
  • famouscrab
      famouscarb @famouscrab

    u know how sum people get amnesia well i got opposite amnesia i remember everything ask me what i ate this morning. breakfast next question

    • 2,842
    • FAVS
    clmarchialexicratesLetdownLizzieschroyzeejuliette_beezfireboltstylestriciamcmillannjosiewash
    • 1,978
    • RETWEETS
    that_doughboynotnotlukeLetdownLizzieschroyzeeRyanCordell4322fireboltstylesvalentinamrrstraypenguin
    _Jim_Fearmojo_caDankHerbMulletbn2bQVTDrThanatos
  • famouscrab
      famouscarb @famouscrab

    you gotta turn your phone off when you fly in case an old plane text you and your new plane get jealous

    • 2,344
    • FAVS
    LetdownLizzieturdvolcanoBenjyHimmelrandomtempnamearandomhimcoolwebsiteuserflygande_mattannishadtrivedi
    • 1,642
    • RETWEETS
    MalinJonsson93gustavperssonJorts_MichaelMyNameIsJakeMan__alfosaurusbectharphella_nopeKfed_the_Red
    hottubpeeAceMakesWordslil_aracuanbn2brobdelaneylaineydiamond____
  • famouscrab
      famouscarb @famouscrab

    hi son like my backwards hat? how bout that gerfald he sure eat a lasagna that cant be good for her. anyways bye *rollerblades away*

    • 2,657
    • FAVS
    that_doughboyKonradnySteezyGreegzleemcdoleSea_Giraffe1NeutronDreDannyF147swedorian
    • 1,322
    • RETWEETS
    LetdownLizziejillianmary_mBeEZlemonSqzydrewskiedwardsbrowntown_xpresfunkylasagnayouturnmejonRealAdultPerson
    cryotunalazy_joe_goodpowerfuljake_likes_napsMaryKoCoingmarbirdmanactualjellyfishabigfatidiotsenderblock23BikiniBabeLover
  • famouscrab
      famouscarb @famouscrab

    "carlos did u put youre shoes on the right feets today" YES DAD LEFT AND RIGHT "on YOUr feet son?" ..DAD THIS IS THE WRONGEST I EVER GOT IT

    • 2,494
    • FAVS
    LetdownLizzieJoughStrixoranmackechniejoshuasomethingavailtonybrooksbromleyschmariboverintergalactic
    • 1,419
    • RETWEETS
    JoughStrixCommanderFredchichonchojoshuasomethinglayrudoavailtonyTrewballgoulcher
    crylenolmathsnailloafbro__________UsedTurtlejonnysunloveletterbombsactualjellyfishBreterbiesvxlk
  • famouscrab
      famouscarb @famouscrab

    what if in airbud they put the dog in and they didnt win that coach would feel stupid

    • 2,096
    • FAVS
    Reddit_DogsChemicalCircusRyanPennerarekeithGucci_Masuccirad__eliMaxterballgrumpstorm
    • 1,554
    • RETWEETS
    RyanCordell4322BethanyInABoxGucci_Masuccimaxisanasshole_McSquigginsMaxterballghostpowerJorts_Michael
    Drew4484chrisjoonior
  • famouscrab
      famouscarb @famouscrab

    space is stuped if im wanted to go somewhere where i cant breathe i would just stand next to a girl

    • 2,242
    • FAVS
    MelizardsjoshuasomethingbrooksbromleykebnBenjyHimmelcoolwebsiteusernishadtrivedikrishna_van
    • 1,374
    • RETWEETS
    notnotlukeCommanderFredchichonchojoshuasomethingkebnsoltysjJorts_Michaelpukebus
    neatdeerspookyquinoamojo_caKKAlThaniemirkr
  • famouscrab
      famouscarb @famouscrab

    hey honey check out this powerpoint i made of my moodswings *flips open laptop so hard it smash into the wall* MAYBE LATER!!!

    • 1,944
    • FAVS
    basktballsarahLetdownLizzie123winkNumberColorshaunterdaditwassarcasmcontrarzelange237
    • 1,181
    • RETWEETS
    LetdownLizziehaunterdaduntomayrobbiebelmontHelloGallogegtikLukeVanDerSpuybitabunny
    KalarlisMaryKoCogreenteam15
  • famouscrab
      famouscarb @famouscrab

    yeah i got a gym membership. its called life. watch me lift this big ass rock. now im gonna do 20 reps of pretending im a beautiful bird

    • 1,560
    • FAVS
    LetdownLizziebrooksbromleyapopagasmlikedadsaysBrian_HennessyHowMuchForGoatAMtotheCruzmaxisanasshole_
    • 1,036
    • RETWEETS
    LetdownLizzieVansantcstraypenguinJorts_Michaelkrishna_vanMyNameIsJakeMan__BlawawawaNateDelM
    someofmybestvinceness
  • famouscrab
      famouscarb @famouscrab

    im not here to make friends! - me at the zoo telling a lie lol

    • 1,508
    • FAVS
    LetdownLizzieZachHaldjawbrokenblauralumerintergalacticcakell09KyleJLankford_SteveThornton
    • 913
    • RETWEETS
    LetdownLizzieTriHugsasthmatticandrefmtBrahmbearMowindamyspacedadaloadofhupla
    A_Jahhvasedgod
  • famouscrab
      famouscarb @famouscrab

    forgot my ipod so im just beatboxing on the bus.driver is breakdancing in the aisle. bus is going crazy right now we havent moved in 2 hours

    • 1,595
    • FAVS
    turdvolcanotwerkahmaxisanasshole_DK_AD_LTunderthesearotteneggyolk_DjamillaShazmodius
    • 820
    • RETWEETS
    spiritpigeontwerkahc7abeDK_AD_hellnaahh_DjamillafrancescalevsEmilylikesGravy
    RowdySailboatMrHeliotrope
  • famouscrab
      famouscarb @famouscrab

    if u get intimidatied by someone just think EVERY1 goes to bed at night and put a blanket over themself so they dont get to cold!!! Aw

    • 1,391
    • FAVS
    LetdownLizzieeregan1421brooksbromleyscary_plantsicedvanillachaigoffkidVerjinyaWolfpale_hamster
    • 910
    • RETWEETS
    jaxlroseLetdownLizziepale_hamsterlaaceyskyeechuckybaby5laurapeters__deeeebagtsperls
    MaryKoCo
  • famouscrab
      famouscarb @famouscrab

    fellas i like to sit on my hand so it goes numb then it feel like someone else is wiping my tears away

    • 1,156
    • FAVS
    BenjyHimmelnishadtrivediecs_iocoolwebsiteuserkrishna_vanJakeJohnNolanlittle__allySweetPatoot
    • 764
    • RETWEETS
    brooksbromleyJorts_MichaelSkeezyDeezysnow_vanEstebandagreat_CursedTeaThatFishCreighRosie_Zadinia
    earfdae
  • famouscrab
      famouscarb @famouscrab

    when i was just born the doctor took me in his big strong arms and thats when i knew for sure i was gay as hell

    • 1,288
    • FAVS
    LetdownLizzieoranmackechnieapopagasmSilasEganDiscourse_coolwebsiteuserDionPloegkrishna_van
    • 610
    • RETWEETS
    SilasEganSynthJonahDaggetoMyNameIsJakeMan__jorD_hi_lDlOT_genuphobia__pilIowpet
    Hermit_Thrush
  • famouscrab
      famouscarb @famouscrab

    Warning: password is case sensitive. password i think ur case is cute dont woorry so much

    • 1,054
    • FAVS
    LetdownLizziesoltysjcoolwebsiteusernishadtrivedikrishna_vansambail_SweetPatoottaylorkauss
    • 815
    • RETWEETS
    soltysjkrishna_vanCidCammisnow_vanshutupheavwhatsgluten______lasertronbiillyb
    RedJakiBlueNoPattern
  • famouscrab
      famouscarb @famouscrab

    dinners READY! *i stab a hole in bottom of cornflakes box, 5 kids crawl in like spiders jostling for floor cereal i dont even know 2 of them

    • 1,164
    • FAVS
    joshuasomethingmaxisanasshole_HairySkeletorrad__eliMaxterballcoolwebsiteuserkrishna_vanRosieBright_
    • 598
    • RETWEETS
    gairmscoileMaxterballghostgarbageMyNameIsJakeMan__pianosianoheytherecoreAlwayzFreeAlotOfThrees
    Lindzetaiandury007
  • famouscrab
      famouscarb @famouscrab

    i want to be as cool as elvis his catch phrase was thank you very much. thats probably the coolest thing i ve ever heard

    • 1,203
    • FAVS
    actuallyawfulcubbyfinkapopagasmrad__eliMaxterballBenjyHimmelbaviddaileyILUV2BITCH
    • 504
    • RETWEETS
    jessylee03MaxterballJorts_Michaelscandicandikate_bishopsMapWithNoOceanIM_BradRiley98DanReeter
    MaryKoCocryotuna
@famouscrab

@famouscrab

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