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It took about an hour for Amy Winehouse's dead body to completely decompose.
I wouldn't normally change a diaper on a restaurant table, but Grandpa was way overdue.
I haven't been the same since I clawed my way out of the grave.
That kid who used to eat paste died from huffing glue.
Love me, love that fart.
I'll tip 20% if the server headbutts me for not leaving a tip.
Pull out or I'll give you a son.
Ask a friend to babysit, then start referring to them as "the help".
I'm a good judge of cock.
The FCC requires all local news sites to look like shit.
Diaper boxes are great for storing all the things you'll never have time for again.
Walk up to the club like: "Where's your Lost And Found? My friend left a placenta here last week."
I bet the worst thing about cancer is how everyone just expects you to fight it.
That fart bowls in a league.
Damn my big beautiful labes.
High in saturated farts.
Walk up to the club like "Is there someplace I can dump my shitty underwear?"
The afterlife sounds like a pain in the ass.