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We can put a man on the moon, but we can't figure out how fucking stupid it is to compare that to everything?
"Thanks, you're a lightsaber." - Something I'd say to my lightsaber after every battle if I were a Jedi
Maybe it's the optimist in me, but I really like having sex with optimists
Eminem is such a homophone
Actually, ethics in games journalism is the name of the scientist who created the monster
Pretty sure I wanted a sex dream about Jon Snow but instead I got one about Ser Jorah Mormont so thanks for that whoever
USA: can we bomb <nation>?
UN: you're gonna anyway, aren't you?
USA: yep. you're a pointless organisation. Syria later, lulz
Don't see what the big deal is about NYE. I get drunk, pass out, and then wake up determined to change my life every day.
I don't think that "turn on" button on Facebook chat works :(
"What the fuck is wrong with all the others? Asshole." - me when someone goes through my feed and favorites select tweets