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  • fluffysuse
      Fluffy Suse @fluffysuse

    It's not PMS if you've got it all month, sweetie, you're just a bitch.

    • 2,008
    • FAVS
    RealJinjaNinjaNorthside_MikezigzagzigggularSapphireBelItsJustMayaFillipeNoMagdalinespearl__GrapeFruitSimm
    • 1,335
    • RETWEETS
    RealJinjaNinjaNorthside_MikeSN_RahamanSapphireBelItsJustMayaLafWhenLifeSuxMagdalinespearl__dawnclarkky
    Northside_MikeArroiaMasterOfFuryHairyJew4LifeSlipNutsTMTeeter_TotterPhoenixRises69I_Mee_Myself_warbird622ShrinkMediaSharpeBytesmojo_bones_FannyB1tch________ImpeccableRoguemediocregeeHesOrHers________thatUPSdudeOphiesbest________MrsGoose69cynicuhlnovocapulumMr_goose007kamtweetingToken_Geezer
  • fluffysuse
      Fluffy Suse @fluffysuse

    The sex was great, but I faked the cuddle.

    • 1,906
    • FAVS
    RealJinjaNinjaBearPauzeout2escapekb_fuxwititTweetNepentheSapphireBel_m_i_kbohdisativa
    • 984
    • RETWEETS
    RealJinjaNinjaBearPauzeTweetNepentheArroiabohdisativaImaFlyontheWallNdaba_farmagoo
    ArroiaVikeeysSecretpalokinLindaInDisguiseTeeter_TotterGirlwithAIDSHello_BellaJimmerThatisAllGhostOfATrophy____emceejgingerfacedmediocregeeToken_GeezerJust_Lee_1HoneyUnhingedVodkaMary
  • fluffysuse
      Fluffy Suse @fluffysuse

    Marriage: I love you so much, I want a legal document to destroy you if you ever leave.

    • 1,620
    • FAVS
    RealJinjaNinjadanieladecastroIleAvilaDuran_AndreaElianaASpanksInsanityAyesha_salSapphireBelziddi_anar
    • 1,008
    • RETWEETS
    RealJinjaNinjaSpanksInsanitymgpabonSN_RahamaniAD33LSapphireBelziddi_anarItsJustMaya
    ImpeccableRogueHrBryDebasaurusRexVikeeysSecretrossbransonXalqeeMikeLaFontaine1MrsGoose69
  • fluffysuse
      Fluffy Suse @fluffysuse

    Thank you. I am completely satisfied by your explanation and have no further questions.

    - No child ever.

    • 1,443
    • FAVS
    RealJinjaNinjaArroiaSapphireBelgouravmalhotraArunapk57RadznandaajmaahiJenniWheezes
    • 923
    • RETWEETS
    RealJinjaNinjaSiemeowwSammypediaspetunia5Arunapk57RadznandaSerleemAlibabamadamemosel_
    eshurneCayenne7300palokinGhostOfATrophy____MummsThaWord______novocapulumAristotlesNZ_______Ellsie_LABeachmomprontopupBigHeb7shgasmUnlucky_NinjaReality_Bytes1Floatersfinest
  • fluffysuse
      Fluffy Suse @fluffysuse

    Oh, just fall in love with me already so I can stop acting normal.

    • 1,323
    • FAVS
    RealJinjaNinjaShamintariqSapphireBelecahZamoraRoughHandedItsJustMayaMentalAbortionsfemmmfatale
    • 695
    • RETWEETS
    RealJinjaNinjaSapphireBelziddi_anarecahZamoraItsJustMayafemmmfataleVikeeysSecretRyanCox006
    THEDUTHCHESSBambamVictoriaVikeeysSecretStevie_Talkjoeyhuggles______Token_Geezer
  • fluffysuse
      Fluffy Suse @fluffysuse

    I am going to ignore you, but you'd better fucking notice me ignoring you.

    • 1,245
    • FAVS
    GladdyBearal_perez720TheRealMelskeeSapphireBelItsJustMayafemmmfataleVikeeysSecretstoner_bitch18
    • 597
    • RETWEETS
    TheRealMelskeeArroiaItsJustMayafemmmfataleVikeeysSecretMandiDuhhzero3_benzRubyFlies
    ArroiaBlondiethegoodPhoenixRises69ThateverydayguyHurly_BurlyVampiliciousXoJaymayAllDayLani_HaydenBenjamin4501JimmerThatisAllNoorShammamaddie11_Andersjimmy_sharpeTuna_LoverCpez38ParentpainsHoneyUnhinged
  • fluffysuse
      Fluffy Suse @fluffysuse

    When your Twittercrush stops starring and RTing you, does that mean they're now your Twitterspouse?

    • 1,258
    • FAVS
    SapphireBelItsJustMayaMoreWantsBeamskeconcretesledge_TheAlexNevilHalfSanePrnessForeverAsking
    • 533
    • RETWEETS
    ziddi_anarItsJustMayaconcretesledge_TheAlexNevilForeverAskingSwitcheeksAyamdizzyMoi_RaRa
    neakel2Cunda22fatubasticusredpawn3ShimshammyfortuitouslifeEarth2EddieToken_GeezerFannyB1tch________
  • fluffysuse
      Fluffy Suse @fluffysuse

    A Twittercrush. A fake relationship where you can get your heart broken and still not get any sex. Where do I sign up?

    • 1,101
    • FAVS
    SapphireBeljunkyardiganItsJustMayaSilver_Cloud_9MoreWantsForeverAskingDearSingleCrackedIllusion
    • 505
    • RETWEETS
    CIconICMCItsJustMayaMoreWantsMa_xieTheKenyan_Savage_ScavangeppwackyracesPhoenixRises69
    HeyZeus666headstrong_girlneakelPinky_0917________
  • fluffysuse
      Fluffy Suse @fluffysuse

    Cute how people say 'age is just a number,' instead of 'you're old, but I'd still fuck you.'

    • 1,072
    • FAVS
    zigzagzigggularSapphireBelwecame2rememberItsJustMayaNiceKiTTy4uTheAlexNevilHorsecoqisfunnyWHEREISWALTJNR
    • 514
    • RETWEETS
    mgpabonSapphireBelItsJustMayaTheAlexNevilbeatbuggoheydoordm_guyAllInWith7s
    HotSnuffJamesonN7bfrosty04________joeyhuggles______
  • fluffysuse
      Fluffy Suse @fluffysuse

    Dear People Who Name and Shame When You Unfollow Them,

    I unfollowed because you're dull and unfunny. But well done for announcing it.

    • 1,119
    • FAVS
    SapphireBelItsJustMayaLover69Bitchdaisysunshine90Tammy2ToneTheAlexNevilForeverAskingDearSingle
    • 458
    • RETWEETS
    TheAlexNevilRick_IZMusadiqZLeightonT82QamaludeenFnAdam_YesIamThatGuyKeithPiper84
    novocapulumStevie_TalkDukeOfOyl________llvvzzJust_Lee_1Xeriland
  • fluffysuse
      Fluffy Suse @fluffysuse

    I really want a pet Canadian.

    • 999
    • FAVS
    srgatorIanFHoodTheRealMelskeeSapphireBelTheAlexNevilHiJCPWallStreetWeednoduffers
    • 564
    • RETWEETS
    IanFHoodTheRealMelskeeYuzedo77ItsJustMayaTheAlexNevilStupidHumansUSAHalfSanePrnessForeverAsking
    hurlariousGreenSmoke_DukeOfOyl________kcountry627______TarzanFeathers
  • fluffysuse
      Fluffy Suse @fluffysuse

    Heart: I hurt :(

    Brain: I know. Think about something else.

    Vagina: I want attention.

    Brain: Shush you, this is all your fault.

    • 982
    • FAVS
    TheRealMelskee1aprildanielsSapphireBel_Strumpet_TheAlexNevilHalfSanePrnessrdm_guyDearSingle
    • 527
    • RETWEETS
    clairdycatveronica_gemTheRealMelskeeSN_RahamanSapphireBelsasshley_ItsJustMayaLoggaDogga
    Ghetto_TrophyDirty_NaomiHoneyUnhingedTenaciousGrace_
  • fluffysuse
      Fluffy Suse @fluffysuse

    Let's play that game where you tell me what I want to hear and I pretend to believe you.

    • 1,009
    • FAVS
    TheRealMelskeeamarok_rocksVickee44SapphireBelCbethriceHSMRCkarisa103fletchworld73
    • 434
    • RETWEETS
    amarok_rocksVickee44nerdthesedaysSapphireBelRoammy18kidsboy95RadznandaRyder2525
    payal_vSandyPeterzStevie_TalkJessObsessMyFairCharityBradBroaddusnononowaityeahohwrigley________Midgetspar
  • fluffysuse
      Fluffy Suse @fluffysuse

    Young people want to look older. Old people want to look younger. And I just want to look like I know what I'm doing.

    • 864
    • FAVS
    TheRealMelskeeshelovespurplejgtwenty47junkyardiganItsJustMayaXclairemckXTheAlexNevilStupidHumansUSA
    • 470
    • RETWEETS
    ItsJustMayaTheAlexNevilMK_kimberlyidelanGamgeeForeverAskingmegleeaughnMz_G123thegayfarmerguy
    dirtyCDNbitchTeeter_TotterShortWhiteNUgly__Parentpains
  • fluffysuse
      Fluffy Suse @fluffysuse

    MEN WHO ACCUSE WOMEN OF NOT MAKING RATIONAL ARGUMENTS, YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE...ooooh pretty shoes, I wonder if they're...mmmmchocolate

    • 898
    • FAVS
    TheRealMelskeeSapphireBelForeverAskingDearSinglethegayfarmerguyTheButchJonesTheKenyan_ashgrash
    • 417
    • RETWEETS
    fallybirdTheAlexNevilJamesonN7SharpeBytesDumbConfessionsxoJazzieJazzRobElliottComiccarcinomarama____
    RikidusFloatersfinest
  • fluffysuse
      Fluffy Suse @fluffysuse

    Falling in love makes you do stupid things. Once I even got married.

    • 876
    • FAVS
    TheRealMelskeeSapphireBelPrometejashelovespurplejunkyardiganRoughHandedItsJustMaya2happyright
    • 417
    • RETWEETS
    ziddi_anarjgtwenty47ItsJustMayaStupidHumansUSAForeverAskingRana_RMD__________DivaDeviousthe_couch_guy____
    Fat_berryIronWangNoorShammaCpez38
  • fluffysuse
      Fluffy Suse @fluffysuse

    1. Join social network
    2. Never be social ever again

    • 745
    • FAVS
    maxschreckweswescanLJay815BruceForceTheRealMelskeeSapphireBelshelovespurpleHalfSanePrness
    • 467
    • RETWEETS
    weswescanRealShaughnBruceForceSapphireBelItsJustMayardm_guyAnEnglishLadIlliter8__________
    BruceForceJimmerThatisAlljimmy_sharpeMessJenkinsSquareKnight
  • fluffysuse
      Fluffy Suse @fluffysuse

    I say haha. He says lol. It’ll never work.

    • 776
    • FAVS
    AndswhatBeamishBoiBruceForceTheRealMelskeeSapphireBelecahZamorashelovespurplejunkyardigan
    • 426
    • RETWEETS
    BruceForceecahZamoraziddi_anarItsJustMayalittlemisspsunHalfSanePrnessTheButchJonesMa_xie
    SharpeBytesrossbransonJazzzzzminabornmiserableLoli_Sugella__fraser
  • fluffysuse
      Fluffy Suse @fluffysuse

    Oh girls, it’s so easy to get a man to fall in love with you. Just be nice, give lots of blowjobs and hide the fact you’re entirely mental.

    • 776
    • FAVS
    TheRealMelskeeSapphireBelwecame2rememberjunkyardiganItsJustMayatonnerrecacaoEllusiveRLaFuzzyNoir
    • 390
    • RETWEETS
    ItsJustMayaYesIamThatGuyrdm_guyTheKenyan_BillArrundalecrunchenhancerthongbeardxoJazzieJazz
    BillArrundaleTwinTwistedINandONyourMINDTHEBU_ZZEDakarmuttShrinkMediaAntiSemanticShwA_SmartAss
  • fluffysuse
      Fluffy Suse @fluffysuse

    Sometimes you just want someone to understand you, when you don't understand yourself.

    • 745
    • FAVS
    TheRealMelskeeAngelaEhh6orahalfdozenmissymsmith1funkyspacecadetthatchickwcurlsNikHimselfAyesha_sal
    • 373
    • RETWEETS
    nora_norainiatlgreeneyesmissymsmith1FarahMadhwi____Eeenie_MeenieTrueTorontoGirlSapphireBelwecame2remember
    thetobbieJustinCase1957MyRedHairIsRealLuvPugSupportPets_billymeetsworldvivalamoi448
@fluffysuse

@fluffysuse

I love watermelon.