6 more followers til 100! Woooo! #twittervirgin

Twitter was invented for driving.

Twitter makes my morning commute go by so fast

I can taste the old spice. This really is hell.

A DMV worker actually just said this may take a while. HA HA HA!!!!! No shit buddy.

I now have 120 followers, does this mean it's safe to drink to celebrate for 120 days?

Yield sign may be the same color as a stop sign but it doesn't mean stop fuck wad #commuterproblems

I better be in the right fucking line. The last sign had an arrow pointing down. To confirm we are in hell.

@karencreets and where the fuck is mulberry lane? Sounds like the street all pedophiles live on If you ask me.

This is my today http://t.co/NP2GSYND

Love! http://t.co/wTdiAyAu

And was sliding around while tweeting that last tweet #hazardoustweeting

@cool_jesse I agree. I'm at DMV so I need all smiles I can get.

Wait. February has 29 days???

@spideroger love spidy! http://t.co/vqM6HHQ0

Its one of those i want Jameson with my coffee kind of days

Driving stick eating banana and tweeting. In stop and go traffic. #likeaboss

So sore I can barely move #toughmudder

@pro_failure @sallydelehant underneathers!!

Um excuse me maam. Your breast is oddly shaped http://t.co/s5wYcrJp